Well, mine frens, I wuz rite. Friday morning, after starfin me ALL nite,
Meowmie shuffed me inna carrybocks anna hauled me off to da TEDs. I hadda
sit around all mornin, STILL starfin, till TED Michelle could get to me.
Imagine, da nerf, dat I shud have to wait fur stoopid TED. Ennyway, while I
wazn't lookin, meensneeky TED shotted me anna I gottid really drowsy. Since
she wuz leafin me 'lone, I decideded to take a nap since I was soo hungry.

Kittiez, whut happeneded next is just too awful to consider! When I woked
up, mine mouf hadda funny taste innit. I ranned my tung around mine teef
anna dey were smoove anna tasted pretty gud. I figured dat dat meensneeky
TED had cleened dem like Meowmie sed she wud. This wuz not so bad, so I
took anufur nap. When I woked up da next time, I sattid up, let da TED
techs know dat I ws STARFIN to DEF, anna looked down attid mineself.
Kittiez, ALLA mine hansum black anna white furz waz GONE!!! While I wuz
sleepin, dat meenastysneekyTED STOLLED alla mine FURZ!

Alla mine furz, eggsept fur sum furz onna mine tayle, legs, anna around mine
face! Dis iz too horrible to fink about! Wirfout mine furz, I'ze nottid
hansum no more anna youze kin reely tell dat I'ze an owld kitty. I'ze
scrawny in playces anna floppy inna playces anna just oogly. When Meowmie
camed to get me, I hidded in da back ov da bocks cuz I dinna want mer to see
me, cuz she mite not luv me no more cuz I'ze so funny lookin. She tooked me
home, tho, anna lettid me owt ov da bocks. She dinna laff at me or call me
oogly, infact, she picked me up anna pettid me anna called me her poor owld
sweetie.

Dis shaved pitiful look has potential, as she givved me a whole tub ov
Sheeba last nite insted of just da hardfud (somefin about mebbe mine teef
being tender frum da cleenin), she gave me lots ov pets anna it wuz pretty
gud all towld. She really likes mine cleenwhite teef anna iz givvin nice
massages, anna troof be towld, it'z gud to be rid ov da mats I'd growed.

Now mine ownly question iz to my Darlin Kitty: Will you still be mine wink
efun do I mostly don't have enny furz?

Boogie da HarpurrCat inna Bawlmer wif cleenwite teef anna very little furz.


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