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Old July 24th 08, 10:12 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
CatNipped[_2_]
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Posts: 4,003
Default Going On Vacation For Awhile

"Kyla =^. .^=`" wrote in message
. ..

OK, I've waited a few days to reply to this so I could answer this calmly,
trying hard not to inadvertently hurt your feelings again.

Hi everyone
I'm going on vacation from here for awhile. I don't want to cause any
more of a fuss than I already have. But first, I want to say a few
things. Yes, I am in a lot of pain, from my knees, which feel like
they're broken all my waking hours.


I have fibromyalgia, which means my whole body hurts 24/7. Add to that
degenerative disk disease in my lower back and compression injuries in my
right wrist, arm, shoulder, and neck (I fractured my wrist and 2 cervical
bones, and when the bone grew back it "overgrew" and pinched down on several
nerves in my neck). I can't sleep at all unless I take 2 Ambien and 3
Flexerils every night, and even with that I wake up all night long from the
pain. I have arthritis in my hands and shoulders and knees. My job
requires me to type and use a mouse anywhere from 8 to 10 hours every
weekday - pounding a keyboard with arthritic fingers and constantly grinding
the bones over the nerves in my neck whenever I move the mouse. My husband
and I have had family disasters that have wiped out all of our savings, so
all I can look forward to is continuing to work, in pain, until the day I
drop dead.

But you know what? I count myself lucky because I see here Kilikini who had
to have surgery so massive and life threatening it makes my pain look like a
paper cut. I see here Pam's husband, Rob, who has been dealing with brain
cancer for years, has had numerous surgeries, and had to endure
chemotherapy, several times I think, with all its horrendous side-effects.
I see here Pam herself who has dealt with flesh-eating bacteria that took
away most of her thigh. I see here Tweed who battled cancer and needed
major surgery twice - once for the cancer and then again for the herniation
caused by the first surgery. I see here Sherry who had to have major heart
bypass surgery. Suz has been in a wheelchair her whole life. Almost
everyone here has some source of pain or worry in their lives - it's pretty
much the human condition. None of them have asked for special treatment
because they're in pain - at most they ask for purrs which are freely given
and self-renewing.

Of course, knowing all that doesn't ease the pain I feel - but it does keep
me from using it as an excuse for behaving badly (I'll own up to that being
pure bitchiness or just plain ignorance). I don't *want* people to feel
sorry for me - *that* is what would diminish me!

And yes I do have emotional/depression issues. Most of us do.


Yep, all of the above tends to be pretty depressing. But since there isn't
anything anyone here can really do about it, except to lend a shoulder to
cry on *occasionally*, I try not to dwell on it.

But, please know I am NO threat to anyone nor your 'card list'.


The fact that you sent letters to, not only members here, but to members'
families *does* make me feel threatened. It may not to others, and if they
don't have a problem with it then I certainly don't have a problem with your
sending letters to them. But I'm *very* protective of my family and I would
not want them to get upsetting letters from a stranger, even if those
letters were "meant well". Again, others may feel differently, but that's
how I feel about it. So, I'm sorry, but yes, if you are going to be given
the Christmas card list, I want my name and address to be taken off of it
first.

If I ask someone for their address and they don't want to give it to me,
I don't take offense at all.
I do, however, resent being called a creepy stalker. That is not me at
all.


Nobody called you a creepy stalker - those were Joyce's words and she
misquoted me. What I wrote was, "Asking for people's addresses, so you can
send them cards or letters, when you don't even know them, is sort of creepy
to me in a "stalkerish" sort of way."

I wrote that, *to you directly*, not *about you to others*, and I did it in
an attempt to show you what you did wrong since you *asked* what you did
wrong!

And other nasty comments about a certain post, I tried to apologize, but
to no avail.


It may have been to more "avail" if you had not made the exact same mistake
over and over again - each time profusely apologetic and "in tears". I'm
sure it looks very cold and unfeeling for anyone to do anything other than
comfort and forgive you when you do that, even when they know that you will
probably do the same thing again in a week or two. But, I'm sorry, I see
that as emotional blackmail in order to behave badly and get away with it.

I'm the first to admit I'm far from perfect, but no one else here is
'perfect' either.


Nope, we certainly are not, most especially not me. All I can do is try to
learn from my mistakes and make an effort not to repeat them.

I realize there are folks here who have cancer and other horrible ailments
and I pray for them, if asked, or send purrs, and good wishes for their
recovery.


The operative words here are "if asked".

I hate to read about animals being tortured and won't open a TW site,
because things like that do upset me indeed. I am NOT self centered, as
someone suggested, quite the opposite.


We can only judge a person by their actions. No matter what pain a member
here might have been going through, you've always seemed to turn it around
into being about you. You have written "in tears", "weeping", "crying" over
and over again, in attempts to garner sympathy and forgiveness, when a
thread started out being about someone *else's* pain.

I try and be a good person and treat others with respect, and I do NOT
abuse my Cats as someone suggested.


*Nobody* suggested you abused your cats - that comment was directed at
someone else. Your assuming that everything is about you is why I see you
as being self centered (which doesn't mean the same thing as "selfish" - it
simply means that you appear to have trouble seeing past your own world and
into someone else's).

I love them too much to do them any harm. I remember which thread that
was.
If someone wants to dig up old posts of mine, and accuse me of
something..well, that's their business.

If I want to cry, I'll cry and that's my business.


Well, of course, but you make it the group's business when you post about
it.

We've all cried at the pain and tragedy members here have written about.
We've even written "in tears" - but we also add "in sympathy" or "with you",
not just to announce to the group that we are weeping because someone here
objected to something we wrote. You could cry without writing about your
crying. The only reason to write about it is to get sympathy.

I've obviously gotten a lot of folks here angry with me, for a number of
reasons, and
I don't want to disrupt the group, so I'll just let Mosey go play on rpcc.


Nobody here has asked you to leave. I'll simply do what I should have done
to begin with and ignore your posts so that *I* won't hurt *you* again.
I've honestly never, ever meant to hurt you.

I really value the friends I've made here and we can keep in touch by
e-mail.
I'll peek in once in awhile and see if anyone needs a purr or prayer and
send them what they need.
Thank you to my friends who put in a good word on my behalf.


If you're talking about Joyce writing "Kyla has some very severe emotional
problems and is unable to behave differently because of it," as putting in a
good word on your behalf, all I can say is a number of people here,
including me, had a different take on that and *defended* you by objecting
to someone saying that about you!

I have tried, in this note, not to be snarky (which seems to come all too
easily for me) and not to be hurtful. I hope I haven't done either because,
again, I didn't write any of this just to hurt you. You seem to be truly
puzzled as to why you are getting some negative reactions here and I just
wanted to try to straighten that out for you for when you come back.

Love, purrs, prayers, hugs and bright blessings to you all
Kyla


Purrs back to you.

Hugs,

CatNipped