Could do with some job purrs (OT)

Tomorrow I am having to go to work and ask my line manager;s line
manager to become my line manager.....The week before last I had a
grievance upheld about an inappropriate referral to Occupational
Health- for most of that week and the week after she was off
sick.There's a lot of bad feeling about her, we have regular mediation
meetings and she's already having special meetings with 2 of the
others- she's alienated everyone pretty much- this has been going on
and off for over 2 years the only time it stops is when she's on long
term sick, which she pretty much does once a year but although she's
made some comments and decisions I didn't agree with (Like when I had
to leave early because Dave's dad died and when she found out all she
could say was "When will you make the time up?") I have tried to stay
out of it because firstly I come to do my job and go home I don't much
fancy taking sides etc and secondly I am not in the same office so
don't have too much to with her and thirdly she's very loud and comes
accross as a bit intimidating even when I don't think she means to be
and I am not very good at handling intimidation..

Anyway at the end of last week we had our monthly 1 to 1 and at the
end of it she casually remarked she;d sent off the referral to
Occupational Health and I should get an appoinment soon.....I did a
double take and she said a comment had been made about an "odour" so
she could do it i.e. someone says I smell. Huh? Of course she can't
tell me who but given she's hardly been in since my grievance was
upheld it's very convenient timing, it's also a rather extreme
reaction and as she can't tell me for all I know she's making it up
unless it was a comment made ages ago and she's been saving it up- the
origins of my first grievance were that she took 8 weeks to do
something, which I should have had an informal meeting about first (Or
as my friend Helena put it "8 weeks?! Was she saving it up for when
she was in a bad mood?!")

She then turns round and says she's being supportive of me I said I
didn't think she was and the next second she snaps "If you think I'm
being vindictive, intimidating or harrassing you have to tell me NOW!"

I actually for a second thought she might lash out one thing you
quickly learn with her is she never did anything- we;ve had statements
at mediation and as soon as a person tries to say she did something
she starts shouting them down and saying it wasn't like that and
they;'re making it up even when witnessess can collaborate. If you
had video footage of her eating a baby she'd choose between 1. You've
got it in for me so much you've hired a stunt double. 2. It wasn't a
baby it was a baby shaped cake or 3. I never wanted anyone to know I
have an evil identical twin sister

Then she started going about how SHE was hurt when I took that
grievance out I was lucky I had another meeting to go to so I got out
of there (This meeting being with the works counselling service due to
the stress of working with her and she knows all about it).

Anyway when I took the original grievance out her line manager asked
if I would like her to line manage me and I said wait and see what
happens..

Well I waited and saw what happened and I do not want her as my line
manager- the timing of the second referral reeks if you'll pardon the
pun of her trying to show me there;s no point in disobeying her (she
is a control freak) and I had better take it lying down or else,,,,

This is not going to be pretty but I am not going to let her
intimidate any longer I am a camel and this is the last straw

I think I am going to write it all out and give it to her line manager
to read because I will be in tears if I try to talk as it is I've had
4 days off and spent much of them worrying about what will happen

Could definitely do with some purrs of support here

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs

Lesley Madigan wrote:
snip
Could definitely do with some purrs of support here

Support purrs on the way, though it sounds like you have a very good
case and probably won't need them.

--
Adrian (Owned by Bagheera & Shadow)
Cats leave pawprints on your heart
http://community.webshots.com/user/clowderuk

Job purrs are on the way - good luck, sweetie.

--
Hugs,

CatNipped
See all our masters at: http://www.PossiblePlaces.com/CatNipped

See the RPCA FAQ site, by Mark Edwards, at:
http://www.professional-geek.com/rpcablog/

"Lesley Madigan" wrote in message
...
Tomorrow I am having to go to work and ask my line manager;s line
manager to become my line manager.....The week before last I had a
grievance upheld about an inappropriate referral to Occupational
Health- for most of that week and the week after she was off
sick.There's a lot of bad feeling about her, we have regular mediation
meetings and she's already having special meetings with 2 of the
others- she's alienated everyone pretty much- this has been going on
and off for over 2 years the only time it stops is when she's on long
term sick, which she pretty much does once a year but although she's
made some comments and decisions I didn't agree with (Like when I had
to leave early because Dave's dad died and when she found out all she
could say was "When will you make the time up?") I have tried to stay
out of it because firstly I come to do my job and go home I don't much
fancy taking sides etc and secondly I am not in the same office so
don't have too much to with her and thirdly she's very loud and comes
accross as a bit intimidating even when I don't think she means to be
and I am not very good at handling intimidation..

Anyway at the end of last week we had our monthly 1 to 1 and at the
end of it she casually remarked she;d sent off the referral to
Occupational Health and I should get an appoinment soon.....I did a
double take and she said a comment had been made about an "odour" so
she could do it i.e. someone says I smell. Huh? Of course she can't
tell me who but given she's hardly been in since my grievance was
upheld it's very convenient timing, it's also a rather extreme
reaction and as she can't tell me for all I know she's making it up
unless it was a comment made ages ago and she's been saving it up- the
origins of my first grievance were that she took 8 weeks to do
something, which I should have had an informal meeting about first (Or
as my friend Helena put it "8 weeks?! Was she saving it up for when
she was in a bad mood?!")

She then turns round and says she's being supportive of me I said I
didn't think she was and the next second she snaps "If you think I'm
being vindictive, intimidating or harrassing you have to tell me NOW!"

I actually for a second thought she might lash out one thing you
quickly learn with her is she never did anything- we;ve had statements
at mediation and as soon as a person tries to say she did something
she starts shouting them down and saying it wasn't like that and
they;'re making it up even when witnessess can collaborate. If you
had video footage of her eating a baby she'd choose between 1. You've
got it in for me so much you've hired a stunt double. 2. It wasn't a
baby it was a baby shaped cake or 3. I never wanted anyone to know I
have an evil identical twin sister

Then she started going about how SHE was hurt when I took that
grievance out I was lucky I had another meeting to go to so I got out
of there (This meeting being with the works counselling service due to
the stress of working with her and she knows all about it).

Anyway when I took the original grievance out her line manager asked
if I would like her to line manage me and I said wait and see what
happens..

Well I waited and saw what happened and I do not want her as my line
manager- the timing of the second referral reeks if you'll pardon the
pun of her trying to show me there;s no point in disobeying her (she
is a control freak) and I had better take it lying down or else,,,,

This is not going to be pretty but I am not going to let her
intimidate any longer I am a camel and this is the last straw

I think I am going to write it all out and give it to her line manager
to read because I will be in tears if I try to talk as it is I've had
4 days off and spent much of them worrying about what will happen

Could definitely do with some purrs of support here

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs

Bucket loads of purrs on their way...having worked for someone with a
similar lack of people management skills I really feel for you Lesley, they
can make life miserable...hope you get the support you need from her line
manager.
Shirley

"Lesley Madigan" wrote in message
...
Tomorrow I am having to go to work and ask my line manager;s line
manager to become my line manager.....The week before last I had a
grievance upheld about an inappropriate referral to Occupational
Health- for most of that week and the week after she was off
sick.There's a lot of bad feeling about her, we have regular mediation
meetings and she's already having special meetings with 2 of the
others- she's alienated everyone pretty much- this has been going on
and off for over 2 years the only time it stops is when she's on long
term sick, which she pretty much does once a year but although she's
made some comments and decisions I didn't agree with (Like when I had
to leave early because Dave's dad died and when she found out all she
could say was "When will you make the time up?") I have tried to stay
out of it because firstly I come to do my job and go home I don't much
fancy taking sides etc and secondly I am not in the same office so
don't have too much to with her and thirdly she's very loud and comes
accross as a bit intimidating even when I don't think she means to be
and I am not very good at handling intimidation..

Anyway at the end of last week we had our monthly 1 to 1 and at the
end of it she casually remarked she;d sent off the referral to
Occupational Health and I should get an appoinment soon.....I did a
double take and she said a comment had been made about an "odour" so
she could do it i.e. someone says I smell. Huh? Of course she can't
tell me who but given she's hardly been in since my grievance was
upheld it's very convenient timing, it's also a rather extreme
reaction and as she can't tell me for all I know she's making it up
unless it was a comment made ages ago and she's been saving it up- the
origins of my first grievance were that she took 8 weeks to do
something, which I should have had an informal meeting about first (Or
as my friend Helena put it "8 weeks?! Was she saving it up for when
she was in a bad mood?!")

She then turns round and says she's being supportive of me I said I
didn't think she was and the next second she snaps "If you think I'm
being vindictive, intimidating or harrassing you have to tell me NOW!"

I actually for a second thought she might lash out one thing you
quickly learn with her is she never did anything- we;ve had statements
at mediation and as soon as a person tries to say she did something
she starts shouting them down and saying it wasn't like that and
they;'re making it up even when witnessess can collaborate. If you
had video footage of her eating a baby she'd choose between 1. You've
got it in for me so much you've hired a stunt double. 2. It wasn't a
baby it was a baby shaped cake or 3. I never wanted anyone to know I
have an evil identical twin sister

Then she started going about how SHE was hurt when I took that
grievance out I was lucky I had another meeting to go to so I got out
of there (This meeting being with the works counselling service due to
the stress of working with her and she knows all about it).

Anyway when I took the original grievance out her line manager asked
if I would like her to line manage me and I said wait and see what
happens..

Well I waited and saw what happened and I do not want her as my line
manager- the timing of the second referral reeks if you'll pardon the
pun of her trying to show me there;s no point in disobeying her (she
is a control freak) and I had better take it lying down or else,,,,

This is not going to be pretty but I am not going to let her
intimidate any longer I am a camel and this is the last straw

I think I am going to write it all out and give it to her line manager
to read because I will be in tears if I try to talk as it is I've had
4 days off and spent much of them worrying about what will happen

Could definitely do with some purrs of support here

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs

On Nov 2, 10:01*am, "shirleycatuk" wrote:
...hope you get the support you need from her line
manager.

If I didn't think there was a good chance that I would then I wouldn't
be talking to her- it was her who encouraged me to take out the first
grievance and upheld it. she's pretty nice and a stickler for the
rules to be followed

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs

"Lesley Madigan" wrote in message


Are you in a union? If so, refer the whole thing to them. You have to
agree to be referred to Occupational Health and there needs to be a good
reason for that, like you are away from work for a long time. If someone
thinks you smell, that's not a good enough reason and as far as I know you
can refuse your OH appt if that's the the only reason for that.
The issue of personal hygiene can be dealt with at a local level by your
line manager.
Tweed



-------------

sTomorrow I am having to go to work and ask my line manager;s line
manager to become my line manager.....The week before last I had a
grievance upheld about an inappropriate referral to Occupational
Health- for most of that week and the week after she was off
sick.There's a lot of bad feeling about her, we have regular mediation
meetings and she's already having special meetings with 2 of the
others- she's alienated everyone pretty much- this has been going on
and off for over 2 years the only time it stops is when she's on long
term sick, which she pretty much does once a year but although she's
made some comments and decisions I didn't agree with (Like when I had
to leave early because Dave's dad died and when she found out all she
could say was "When will you make the time up?") I have tried to stay
out of it because firstly I come to do my job and go home I don't much
fancy taking sides etc and secondly I am not in the same office so
don't have too much to with her and thirdly she's very loud and comes
accross as a bit intimidating even when I don't think she means to be
and I am not very good at handling intimidation..

Anyway at the end of last week we had our monthly 1 to 1 and at the
end of it she casually remarked she;d sent off the referral to
Occupational Health and I should get an appoinment soon.....I did a
double take and she said a comment had been made about an "odour" so
she could do it i.e. someone says I smell. Huh? Of course she can't
tell me who but given she's hardly been in since my grievance was
upheld it's very convenient timing, it's also a rather extreme
reaction and as she can't tell me for all I know she's making it up
unless it was a comment made ages ago and she's been saving it up- the
origins of my first grievance were that she took 8 weeks to do
something, which I should have had an informal meeting about first (Or
as my friend Helena put it "8 weeks?! Was she saving it up for when
she was in a bad mood?!")

She then turns round and says she's being supportive of me I said I
didn't think she was and the next second she snaps "If you think I'm
being vindictive, intimidating or harrassing you have to tell me NOW!"

I actually for a second thought she might lash out one thing you
quickly learn with her is she never did anything- we;ve had statements
at mediation and as soon as a person tries to say she did something
she starts shouting them down and saying it wasn't like that and
they;'re making it up even when witnessess can collaborate. If you
had video footage of her eating a baby she'd choose between 1. You've
got it in for me so much you've hired a stunt double. 2. It wasn't a
baby it was a baby shaped cake or 3. I never wanted anyone to know I
have an evil identical twin sister

Then she started going about how SHE was hurt when I took that
grievance out I was lucky I had another meeting to go to so I got out
of there (This meeting being with the works counselling service due to
the stress of working with her and she knows all about it).

Anyway when I took the original grievance out her line manager asked
if I would like her to line manage me and I said wait and see what
happens..

Well I waited and saw what happened and I do not want her as my line
manager- the timing of the second referral reeks if you'll pardon the
pun of her trying to show me there;s no point in disobeying her (she
is a control freak) and I had better take it lying down or else,,,,

This is not going to be pretty but I am not going to let her
intimidate any longer I am a camel and this is the last straw

I think I am going to write it all out and give it to her line manager
to read because I will be in tears if I try to talk as it is I've had
4 days off and spent much of them worrying about what will happen

Could definitely do with some purrs of support here

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs

Lesley Madigan wrote:

Tomorrow I am having to go to work and ask my line manager;s line
manager to become my line manager.....The week before last I had a
grievance upheld about an inappropriate referral to Occupational
Health- for most of that week and the week after she was off
sick.There's a lot of bad feeling about her, we have regular mediation
meetings and she's already having special meetings with 2 of the
others- she's alienated everyone pretty much- this has been going on
and off for over 2 years the only time it stops is when she's on long
term sick, which she pretty much does once a year but although she's
made some comments and decisions I didn't agree with (Like when I had
to leave early because Dave's dad died and when she found out all she
could say was "When will you make the time up?") I have tried to stay
out of it because firstly I come to do my job and go home I don't much
fancy taking sides etc and secondly I am not in the same office so
don't have too much to with her and thirdly she's very loud and comes
accross as a bit intimidating even when I don't think she means to be
and I am not very good at handling intimidation..

Anyway at the end of last week we had our monthly 1 to 1 and at the
end of it she casually remarked she;d sent off the referral to
Occupational Health and I should get an appoinment soon.....I did a
double take and she said a comment had been made about an "odour" so
she could do it i.e. someone says I smell. Huh? Of course she can't
tell me who but given she's hardly been in since my grievance was
upheld it's very convenient timing, it's also a rather extreme
reaction and as she can't tell me for all I know she's making it up
unless it was a comment made ages ago and she's been saving it up- the
origins of my first grievance were that she took 8 weeks to do
something, which I should have had an informal meeting about first (Or
as my friend Helena put it "8 weeks?! Was she saving it up for when
she was in a bad mood?!")

She then turns round and says she's being supportive of me I said I
didn't think she was and the next second she snaps "If you think I'm
being vindictive, intimidating or harrassing you have to tell me NOW!"

I actually for a second thought she might lash out one thing you
quickly learn with her is she never did anything- we;ve had statements
at mediation and as soon as a person tries to say she did something
she starts shouting them down and saying it wasn't like that and
they;'re making it up even when witnessess can collaborate. If you
had video footage of her eating a baby she'd choose between 1. You've
got it in for me so much you've hired a stunt double. 2. It wasn't a
baby it was a baby shaped cake or 3. I never wanted anyone to know I
have an evil identical twin sister

Then she started going about how SHE was hurt when I took that
grievance out I was lucky I had another meeting to go to so I got out
of there (This meeting being with the works counselling service due to
the stress of working with her and she knows all about it).

Wow! This woman has some serious emotional problems. It is so hard to
deal with people who won't accept responsibility for any of their
actions - and much more so when that person is your boss.

As for the "odor" problem - I was once harassed about that on a job.
My supervisor threatened to move my desk so that I sat obviously apart
from everyone else, if I didn't "clean up". Since I didn't have a
hygiene problem, there was nothing I could do to change anything, so
I said that if she did that, I'd quit on the spot. My voice broke as
I said that, which was embarrassing, but she backed down anyway.

So I know how *that* feels. It's humiliating. Even when you know it's
just being done for harassment, you feel dirty somehow. Well, I did.

I hope the meeting goes well! You definitely need a new manager.

Joyce

--
I will not sniff at my male human's feet after he takes his shoes off,
freeze my mouth open in disgust and then sniff my private parts to compare
odors. -- Cat Resolutions

On Nov 2, 10:59*am, "Christina Websell"
wrote:

Are you in a union? *If so, refer the whole thing to them.

They know the situation I am far from the only member who has issues
with this manager

*You have to
agree to be referred to Occupational Health

Under NHS rules a manager can refer you without your consent
apparently

*If someone
thinks you smell, that's not a good enough reason

I doubt whether it's even true I shower every morning without fail-
the only comments ever made to me on the matter have been to ask me
what my perfume is as it really smells nice besides which she referred
to it as "an odour" what does that mean? The only thing I can think
of is that when it rains heavily my waterproof jacket can smell
slightly of chemicals when wet - I know about this- I keep air
freshner in my office for this and for occasions ,like when I have
fish and chips for lunch
..
The issue of personal hygiene can be dealt with at a local level by your
line manager.

Indeed if she was handling the issue tactfully and sensibly I might
even be inclined to let it go but she's not from where I am sitting it
reads that she got caught out (her line manager did not believe
someone with 2+ years management experience in our Trust and more
elsewhere could not read and interpret the Trust wide sickness policy
accurately to the extent she waited 8 weeks to take an arbitary action
of sending a referral to OH- when she wanted to know why I was
complaining now and not at my stage 1 meeting was horrified that I had
not even had one) so she figured she'd make up some wild accusation
preferably one she hoped would upset me so much maybe I'd just roll
over and beg so she could just do what she wanted anyway

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs

On Nov 2, 11:16*am, wrote:

So I know how *that* feels. It's humiliating. Even when you know it's
just being done for harassment, you feel dirty somehow. Well, I did.

I did feel like that- I think she was hoping I would so mortified I'd
just let it go ahead but I don't have a problem as I said in the last
post I shower every morning, wear clean clothes, apply perfume and
deodourant clean my teeth etc and at lunchtime I freshen up with a
facial wipe and top up my perfume. In fact in no particular order I
probably smell of tea tree and mint (shower gel), perfume, exotic
flowers and ylang ylang (washing liquid) and lotus and black diamonds
(fabric conditioner)

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs

i won't go into detail, but i haave felt this pain, will set all the cats to
purring asap, Lee
"Lesley Madigan" wrote in message
...
Tomorrow I am having to go to work and ask my line manager;s line
manager to become my line manager.....The week before last I had a
grievance upheld about an inappropriate referral to Occupational
Health- for most of that week and the week after she was off
sick.There's a lot of bad feeling about her, we have regular mediation
meetings and she's already having special meetings with 2 of the
others- she's alienated everyone pretty much- this has been going on
and off for over 2 years the only time it stops is when she's on long
term sick, which she pretty much does once a year but although she's
made some comments and decisions I didn't agree with (Like when I had
to leave early because Dave's dad died and when she found out all she
could say was "When will you make the time up?") I have tried to stay
out of it because firstly I come to do my job and go home I don't much
fancy taking sides etc and secondly I am not in the same office so
don't have too much to with her and thirdly she's very loud and comes
accross as a bit intimidating even when I don't think she means to be
and I am not very good at handling intimidation..

Anyway at the end of last week we had our monthly 1 to 1 and at the
end of it she casually remarked she;d sent off the referral to
Occupational Health and I should get an appoinment soon.....I did a
double take and she said a comment had been made about an "odour" so
she could do it i.e. someone says I smell. Huh? Of course she can't
tell me who but given she's hardly been in since my grievance was
upheld it's very convenient timing, it's also a rather extreme
reaction and as she can't tell me for all I know she's making it up
unless it was a comment made ages ago and she's been saving it up- the
origins of my first grievance were that she took 8 weeks to do
something, which I should have had an informal meeting about first (Or
as my friend Helena put it "8 weeks?! Was she saving it up for when
she was in a bad mood?!")

She then turns round and says she's being supportive of me I said I
didn't think she was and the next second she snaps "If you think I'm
being vindictive, intimidating or harrassing you have to tell me NOW!"

I actually for a second thought she might lash out one thing you
quickly learn with her is she never did anything- we;ve had statements
at mediation and as soon as a person tries to say she did something
she starts shouting them down and saying it wasn't like that and
they;'re making it up even when witnessess can collaborate. If you
had video footage of her eating a baby she'd choose between 1. You've
got it in for me so much you've hired a stunt double. 2. It wasn't a
baby it was a baby shaped cake or 3. I never wanted anyone to know I
have an evil identical twin sister

Then she started going about how SHE was hurt when I took that
grievance out I was lucky I had another meeting to go to so I got out
of there (This meeting being with the works counselling service due to
the stress of working with her and she knows all about it).

Anyway when I took the original grievance out her line manager asked
if I would like her to line manage me and I said wait and see what
happens..

Well I waited and saw what happened and I do not want her as my line
manager- the timing of the second referral reeks if you'll pardon the
pun of her trying to show me there;s no point in disobeying her (she
is a control freak) and I had better take it lying down or else,,,,

This is not going to be pretty but I am not going to let her
intimidate any longer I am a camel and this is the last straw

I think I am going to write it all out and give it to her line manager
to read because I will be in tears if I try to talk as it is I've had
4 days off and spent much of them worrying about what will happen

Could definitely do with some purrs of support here

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs