Cat haiku

I don't know who wrote these, but someone posted them on another newsgroup.
I thought they'd be appropriate here.

CAT HAIKU:


The food in my bowl
Is old, and - more to the point -
Contains no tuna.

So you want to play.
Will I claw at dancing string?
Your ankle's closer.

There's no dignity
In being sick - which is why
I don't tell you where.

Seeking solitude
I am locked in the closet.
For once I need you.

Tiny can, dumped in
Plastic bowl. Presentation,
One star; service: none.

Am I in your way?
You seem to have it backwards:
This pillow's taken.

Your mouth is moving;
Up and down, emitting noise.
I've lost interest.

The dog wags his tail,
Seeking approval. See mine?
Different message.

My brain: walnut-sized.
Yours: largest among primates.
Yet, who leaves for work?

Most problems can be
Ignored. The more difficult
Ones can be slept through.

My affection is conditional.
Don't stand up,
It's your lap I love.

Cats can't steal the breath
Of children. But if my tail's
Pulled again, I'll learn.

So you call this thing
Your "cat carrier." I call
These my "blades of death."

Toy mice, dancing yarn
Meowing sounds. I'm convinced:
You're an idiot.



--

Joy

To belittle is to be little.
--anon.

I also posted it to my cat newsgroup.

--

Joy

To belittle is to be little.
--anon.

"Joy" wrote in message
...
I don't know who wrote these, but someone posted them on another newsgroup.
I thought they'd be appropriate here.

CAT HAIKU:


The food in my bowl
Is old, and - more to the point -
Contains no tuna.

So you want to play.
Will I claw at dancing string?
Your ankle's closer.

There's no dignity
In being sick - which is why
I don't tell you where.

Seeking solitude
I am locked in the closet.
For once I need you.

Tiny can, dumped in
Plastic bowl. Presentation,
One star; service: none.

Am I in your way?
You seem to have it backwards:
This pillow's taken.

Your mouth is moving;
Up and down, emitting noise.
I've lost interest.

The dog wags his tail,
Seeking approval. See mine?
Different message.

My brain: walnut-sized.
Yours: largest among primates.
Yet, who leaves for work?

Most problems can be
Ignored. The more difficult
Ones can be slept through.

My affection is conditional.
Don't stand up,
It's your lap I love.

Cats can't steal the breath
Of children. But if my tail's
Pulled again, I'll learn.

So you call this thing
Your "cat carrier." I call
These my "blades of death."

Toy mice, dancing yarn
Meowing sounds. I'm convinced:
You're an idiot.



--

Joy

To belittle is to be little.
--anon.

Those are great! Did you write them?

--

Joy

To belittle is to be little.
--anon.

"Mark Edwards" wrote in message
...

Here are some mo

I need to throw up.
Mostly for vengeful reasons.
Yes, your shoes will do.

Furry and soft stray
Convinces you to feed her.
She is now your cat.

Are you eating that?
Too bad, if you are - it's mine.
Nothing you can do.

I am not evil.
Despite what troublemakers say,
I'm just drawn that way.

Fur, purrs and cuddles
Make me a great companion.
I'll enhance your life.


Hugs and Purrs,
Mark
--
RPCA FAQ: http://www.professional-geek.com/rpcablog/

No cluons were harmed when Joy wrote:
Those are great! Did you write them?

Thank you. Yes I did.


Mark Edwards
--
Proof of Sanity Forged Upon Request

"Mark Edwards" wrote in message
m...
No cluons were harmed when Joy wrote:
Those are great! Did you write them?

Thank you. Yes I did.


Mark Edwards

Good job! It's fun to play with haiku, isn't it? I had never done so, but
a few months ago I was reading a book by Richard Lederer, in which he
challenged the reader to write haiku. Just for fun I decided to try it and
cranked out several of them related to Australia and my love for it.

Joy

On 13/04/2011 21:23, Joy wrote:
"Mark wrote in message
m...
No cluons were harmed when Joy wrote:
Those are great! Did you write them?

Thank you. Yes I did.


Mark Edwards

Good job! It's fun to play with haiku, isn't it? I had never done so, but
a few months ago I was reading a book by Richard Lederer, in which he
challenged the reader to write haiku. Just for fun I decided to try it and
cranked out several of them related to Australia and my love for it.

Mark wrote a lovely haiku for Frank when he died:

Sweet black and white cat
Rises beyond his body
To play forever.

--
Marina, Miranda and Caliban.
In loving memory of Frank and Nikki.

"Marina" wrote in message
...
On 13/04/2011 21:23, Joy wrote:
"Mark wrote in message
m...
No cluons were harmed when Joy wrote:
Those are great! Did you write them?

Thank you. Yes I did.


Mark Edwards

Good job! It's fun to play with haiku, isn't it? I had never done so,
but
a few months ago I was reading a book by Richard Lederer, in which he
challenged the reader to write haiku. Just for fun I decided to try it
and
cranked out several of them related to Australia and my love for it.

Mark wrote a lovely haiku for Frank when he died:

Sweet black and white cat
Rises beyond his body
To play forever.

--
Marina, Miranda and Caliban.
In loving memory of Frank and Nikki.

That's beautiful!

Joy

On Apr 13, 3:54*am, Mark Edwards wrote:

Furry and soft stray
Convinces you to feed her.
She is now your cat.

Ain't that just the truth?!

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs