10: Flames FAQ

FAQ for Newbies to Usenet

How to Flame on the Net

by Dani K and Susan Edkins

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Dani K:

"Flaming" is a popular pastime online that many of us enjoy, so I will
give you a few tips for appropriate flaming.

A flame is an insulting message, either posted or emailed. Generally the
purpose of flaming is to bloat your own ego while ripping your opponent
to shreds. Flames are often used as educational messages but you should
try to keep in mind that if you are insulting someone chances are good
they aren't going to listen to the wisdom you are imparting. Hopefully
your other readers will get the message but don't expect your opponent
to hear anything beyond the insult.

If you post a flame, you should *always* try to email a copy of the
flame to your opponent. They deserve to know they are being flamed and
they deserve the extra time they might need to format a response.

If your flame essentially gives the message that your opponent is not
welcome in the newsgroup you are flaming from or that your opponent is
posting inappropriately to that newsgroup you should always post it.
This is not an acceptable message to send privately. The rest of the
newsgroup deserves to know that you have taken it into your head to
police the newsgroup and to rip you to shreds if they think you are out
of line.

In general using profanity in a flame is not good enough. If someone has
irritated you and you choose to respond with a flame, telling that
person, "You SUCK and your mother eats ****," will not win you many
friends primarily because it is boring. If instead, you use your
imagination to insult in an educated manner, even those who completely
disagree with you will applaud.

Personally, if I've prepared a particularly imaginative flame, I run it
through my Word program for spelling and grammar before I post it. It
makes me look better if I have not made obvious spelling and grammar
errors and the point of flaming is to boost your ego while slamming your
opponent for the entertainment value and possible edification of your
readers.

It is possible to disagree without flaming. If you want to disagree but
are not in the mood to boost your ego by slamming your opponent then do
not use insulting phrases or words. Outline your argument politely and
back it up with some education and thought.

When you post to a newsgroup, you are joining an ongoing conversation.
Generally the rules of etiquette apply with some variations. There is
nothing wrong with interrupting the conversation as long as you do not
interrupt it with something outrageously stupid. When someone wanders
into a conversation to tell everyone, "YOU ALL SUCK," they are being
outrageously stupid. What is worse, they are being outrageously stupid
in front of thousands of people, many of whom will NEVER forget it.

When someone joins a conversation that is about a specific topic their
comments should generally be related to that topic. Walking up to a
group of people who are discussing the pros and cons of lying to their
kids about Santa Claus and announcing, "Hey guys, didja know the soaps
are showing gay guys *IN BED*?" is rude.

Susan Edkins:

I'd like to add one more tip, if I may. When you feel that yearn to
burn, click on that reply button, snip as much extraneous matter as
possible from the original message, flex your fingers and set that
screen on fire. When you've crafted the ultimate flame, sit back and
admire it for a while and store it if possible (my newsreader, for
example, has a "Deferred Delivery" option). This gives you a chance to
continue reading the NG, finish the thread and make sure that the flamee
hasn't already been pulverised and is no longer a fit target for your
righteous wrath. Don't ya just hate it when that happens?? If there's
nowhere to store your response, you could go for a bag of Cheetos and a
hot chocolate or something. When you come back, admire it some more and
if you still want to, send that sucker! For myself, I've found that an
undelivered flame is nearly as much fun to write and much less likely to
embarrass me later on down the line.


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Further items on Netiquette may be found at

http://blakjak.com/gen_men2.htm


This document may also be found at

http://blakjak.com/flme_faq.htm


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