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Another OT Venting



 
 
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  #1  
Old January 13th 05, 01:20 AM
jmcquown
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Default Another OT Venting

Forgive me, particularly Bridget who nearly lost her beloved father. Don't
get me wrong, I love my father dearly.

However, mine has just informed me no way in HELL will he help me pay my
bills. Said he's done far enough for me and that's the end of it and I
should get a job as a greeter at WalMart or something if that's what it
takes. He blames me for losing my job, even though I worked there for 11
years. He has no idea about working in the corporate world; he's retired
military. (He worked one civilian job after that as Director of Security at
a college, where he was pretty much allowed to act like the retired officer
he is.)

He wants me to sell all my furniture and move in with my brother. My
brother has a house - and the room I'd move into actually contains bedroom
furniture *I* gave to him when he had none. Dad said sell your couch, sell
your tables, sell everything but your cookware (don't ask why he thinks I
should keep that and nothing else) and your clothes and get your a** over
there. Oh, and when I get back on my feet, then what? Then I have no
furniture and what... like a college kid have to start all over again? It
took me *years* to acquire 5 rooms worth of furniture!

Assuming I wanted for a single moment to move in with my brother... there is
the matter of my lease. My apartment manager graciously waived a rent
increase and eliminated the monthly pet fee for Persia in light of my
circumstances. But if I break the lease without being transferred by a job
outside of this area, I incur an automatic $700 plus a $420 "re-decorating"
fee. No offer of help with that, just the suggestion I work a couple of
jobs at the same time because he's not lifting a finger to help me. This
from the guy who thought I could sell a stupid book on eBay for $30K. Now I
have to pay the friggin listing fees and no, I didn't ask $30,000 for it LOL

Dad blames me for having a bitch of a manager I didn't get along with who
finally found a way to get rid of me. Says I played into office politics so
it's my fault. He's angry because I was "galavanting all over the place
with that guy John". That "galavanting" paid my bills for most of 2004.

I'm sitting here crying. I'm going to hug my kitty now.

Jill


  #2  
Old January 13th 05, 01:35 AM
Monique Y. Mudama
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On 2005-01-13, jmcquown penned:
Forgive me, particularly Bridget who nearly lost her beloved father. Don't
get me wrong, I love my father dearly.


That's why it hurts so much when they say mean things =/

As near as I can tell, most fathers simply live in a different world. My dad
went from being in the military to working for the government, and mom would
frequently try to remind him that he couldn't run his family the way he ran
his office at work. Often he irritably disagreed with her. I love my
parents, but I'm sooo glad to be out of the house =)

You're in a really tight spot, and it sounds like your dad just doesn't get
it. Even if it *were* your fault that you were fired, what good does it do to
focus on that? It's irrelevant now.

*hug* It'll all work out. It will. Just keep trying, and if you can, just
don't let your dad talk to you this way. If you're talking to him and he
starts up the same old spiel, tell him that you're busy and you have to go
now. Train him with timeouts, just as you would a cat. Spray bottle optional
=P

--
monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!*
  #3  
Old January 13th 05, 02:27 AM
jmcquown
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Monique Y. Mudama wrote:
On 2005-01-13, jmcquown penned:
Forgive me, particularly Bridget who nearly lost her beloved father.
Don't get me wrong, I love my father dearly.


That's why it hurts so much when they say mean things =/

As near as I can tell, most fathers simply live in a different world.
My dad went from being in the military to working for the government,
and mom would frequently try to remind him that he couldn't run his
family the way he ran his office at work. Often he irritably
disagreed with her. I love my parents, but I'm sooo glad to be out
of the house =)

You're in a really tight spot, and it sounds like your dad just
doesn't get it. Even if it *were* your fault that you were fired,
what good does it do to focus on that? It's irrelevant now.

*hug* It'll all work out. It will. Just keep trying, and if you
can, just don't let your dad talk to you this way. If you're talking
to him and he starts up the same old spiel, tell him that you're busy
and you have to go now. Train him with timeouts, just as you would a
cat. Spray bottle optional =P


LOL! Thanks, Monique. My "real" father apparently lives in a parallel
universe... after making me cry he just had my mom call to ask me the name
of my bank. She said "You know how he is, he sits and stews about things."
Yeah, like he thought I could get $30,000 for a book. She laughed and took
down my bank info.

Tomorrow I'll go sign up with some temp agencies.

Jill


  #4  
Old January 13th 05, 02:41 AM
Karen Chuplis
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Default

in article , jmcquown at
wrote on 1/12/05 6:20 PM:

Forgive me, particularly Bridget who nearly lost her beloved father. Don't
get me wrong, I love my father dearly.

However, mine has just informed me no way in HELL will he help me pay my
bills. Said he's done far enough for me and that's the end of it and I
should get a job as a greeter at WalMart or something if that's what it
takes. He blames me for losing my job, even though I worked there for 11
years. He has no idea about working in the corporate world; he's retired
military. (He worked one civilian job after that as Director of Security at
a college, where he was pretty much allowed to act like the retired officer
he is.)

He wants me to sell all my furniture and move in with my brother. My
brother has a house - and the room I'd move into actually contains bedroom
furniture *I* gave to him when he had none. Dad said sell your couch, sell
your tables, sell everything but your cookware (don't ask why he thinks I
should keep that and nothing else) and your clothes and get your a** over
there. Oh, and when I get back on my feet, then what? Then I have no
furniture and what... like a college kid have to start all over again? It
took me *years* to acquire 5 rooms worth of furniture!

Assuming I wanted for a single moment to move in with my brother... there is
the matter of my lease. My apartment manager graciously waived a rent
increase and eliminated the monthly pet fee for Persia in light of my
circumstances. But if I break the lease without being transferred by a job
outside of this area, I incur an automatic $700 plus a $420 "re-decorating"
fee. No offer of help with that, just the suggestion I work a couple of
jobs at the same time because he's not lifting a finger to help me. This
from the guy who thought I could sell a stupid book on eBay for $30K. Now I
have to pay the friggin listing fees and no, I didn't ask $30,000 for it LOL

Dad blames me for having a bitch of a manager I didn't get along with who
finally found a way to get rid of me. Says I played into office politics so
it's my fault. He's angry because I was "galavanting all over the place
with that guy John". That "galavanting" paid my bills for most of 2004.

I'm sitting here crying. I'm going to hug my kitty now.

Jill


Aww Jill. I know it seems mean, but usually that just means they are really
worried. I think that is his version of "tough love". I sure hope things
get better soon and I hope you can find something that is just spectacular.

  #5  
Old January 13th 05, 02:52 AM
Lucy's Mom
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Default

{{{{{Jill}}}}},

Sounds like your dad and mine would get along fine.....Mine always had
a way to make me cry.....don't miss him a bit but that's another
story......

Anyhow, you just do whatever you need to do to keep yourself and
Persia safe and sane and don't worry about him, ok?

Purrs coming your way...
--Kim and Lucy

  #6  
Old January 13th 05, 03:24 AM
Dan M
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Default

I'm sitting here crying. I'm going to hug my kitty now.

Jill


We will be sending our absolute best purrs your way, and will keep doing so.

  #7  
Old January 13th 05, 03:27 AM
Monique Y. Mudama
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Default

On 2005-01-13, jmcquown penned:

LOL! Thanks, Monique. My "real" father apparently lives in a parallel
universe... after making me cry he just had my mom call to ask me the name
of my bank. She said "You know how he is, he sits and stews about things."
Yeah, like he thought I could get $30,000 for a book. She laughed and took
down my bank info.


Well, good luck with the bank thing! Maybe he just needed some time, and
probably some prodding from your mom.

Tomorrow I'll go sign up with some temp agencies.


Sound good!

--
monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!*
  #8  
Old January 13th 05, 03:34 AM
Magic Mood Jeep
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Default

jmcquown wrote:
Forgive me, particularly Bridget who nearly lost her beloved father.
Don't get me wrong, I love my father dearly.

snip

Wow. My father is former USAF, and would be *nearing* his eighties were he
still alive. I certainly hope he wouldn't be like that. My mother, on the
other hand, I know would help *some*. My sister, who lives in Florida, lost
her job around Christmas '03, but her hubby is still employed. However,
they are having domestic diffuclties. Fortunately, they chose to not have
children, as my sister likes to come up to visit Mom once a year (I just
found out that Mom was paying her airfair all these years). When she called
Mom on Thanksgiving, she menioned a 'one-way ticket', which shocked Mom.
This was the first we had heard ot their domestic problems. Mom told me,
she's welcome to stay here, but only for a month, then she's on her own.
There *are* jobs out there - ya just gotta scrape the barrel sides to find
them. And it's worse for Sis: she has absolutely *no* computer skills
whatsoever, her spelling and grammer are attrocious (not to mention her
penmanship isn't that good either), and she has poor dentistry (missing a
front tooth or two, and *refuses* to go to a dentist (bad experiance as a
young child), even though Mom has offered to pay). She had to have help to
use Wal-Mart's computer-application system.

But that's nothing compared to *your* problem.

Jill, do you mind me asking what field you used to work in? Just curious.
Also, the company my husband works for (Sabin Corporation, part of the Cook
Group - http://www.cookgroup.com/index.html is always looking for good
reliable help. You might want to check into it and maybe fax in a resume'.
Of course, you *would* have to relocate, not necessarily to IN as they have
plants in NC, PA, Denmark, Brisbane AUS, Limerick IRE, and another
wholly-owned company in Poway CA. They also own a lot of other business
here in Bloomington (local antique mall, a B&B, and a property management
comany (who recently built a brownstone that the 'penthouse' (it's only
about a 4-story building) goes for over $2,000/month). It never hurts to
try.



--
The ONE and ONLY
lefthanded-pathetic-paranoid-psychotic-sarcastic-wiseass-ditzy
former-blonde in Bloomington! (And proud of it, too) email me at
nalee1964 (at) insightbb (dot) com
http://community.webshots.com/user/mgcmdjeep



  #9  
Old January 13th 05, 04:01 AM
jmcquown
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Posts: n/a
Default

Magic Mood Jeep wrote:
jmcquown wrote:
Forgive me, particularly Bridget who nearly lost her beloved father.
Don't get me wrong, I love my father dearly.

snip

Jill, do you mind me asking what field you used to work in? Just
curious.


I have extensive experience troubleshooting in Unix but not enough to be
considered an Admin in Unix. QA Testing but it was in a proprietary
application developed for workers comp, liability and disability claims.
Used to be a licensed insurance agent in life, health and AD&D but I've
never worked in a "sales" capacity for insurance. Usually a third party
claims administration scenario and then software
support/testing/development.

I hate to say it, but I every headhunter I've talked to has said to me, "Oh,
you made over $41K a year?" followed by a great big sigh. Yeah... and they
can find some college kid who thinks $16K is the thrill of a lifetime.
(sigh)

Also, the company my husband works for (Sabin Corporation,
part of the Cook Group - http://www.cookgroup.com/index.html is
always looking for good reliable help. You might want to check into
it and maybe fax in a resume'. Of course, you *would* have to
relocate, not necessarily to IN


I have no problem with IN except for the snow! LOL Actually, John is still
talking (half seriously) about Napanee. He'd like to find an old barn to
convert to a home and studio.

as they have plants in NC, PA,
Denmark, Brisbane AUS, Limerick IRE, and another wholly-owned company
in Poway CA. They also own a lot of other business here in
Bloomington (local antique mall, a B&B, and a property management
comany (who recently built a brownstone that the 'penthouse' (it's
only about a 4-story building) goes for over $2,000/month). It never
hurts to try.

You're a sweetie, thanks for the suggestions! And rest assured and assure
Weebs, Persia will always have the uppermost care, as will my lovebird,
Peaches.

Jill
--
The ONE and ONLY
lefthanded-pathetic-paranoid-psychotic-sarcastic-wiseass-ditzy
former-blonde in Bloomington! (And proud of it, too) email me at
nalee1964 (at) insightbb (dot) com
http://community.webshots.com/user/mgcmdjeep




  #10  
Old January 13th 05, 04:20 AM
Mathew Kagis
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Default



SNIP

I'm sitting here crying. I'm going to hug my kitty now.

Jill


Jill: Drag.... Dad's can be like that.... My pop has mellowed over the
years, but I remember a couple of similar instances... Much yelling, a
refusal to help, Followed by a check... And a grumbling demand about
'timeley' re-payment.... Followed a couple of weeks later, by a 'no need to
pay me back' phonecall.

My Dad was'nt military, he was civil service... Union, job security all that
stuff that our generation has a brutally hard time getting, but our parent's
don't get why it's soo tough.... Still stuck in the 70's, when good jobs
were a dime a dozen & a Batchelor degree got you a GREAT job....

He'll come around...I hope. Good luck... How's the sleep thing going?
--
Mathew
Butler to 2 kittens: Chablis & Muscat
En Vino Veritas


 




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