Dumb Hoomin! (from Sammy)

(Little warning note to softhearted people who don't like to hear
about cats hunting birds - though no birds were actually caught. Now,
on with Sammy's story

Earlier today I channeled a message through our hoomin about the great
morning we had here. The good times ended prematurely, though, thanks
to the hoomin's ill conceived idea of time when he insisted it was
time to leave the Out and go back inside.

Before I go on about the latest DUMB thing the hoomin did, I need give
you some background. Rocky came to live with us last fall. At first
Momma Little Bit and I weren't too happy about it. But to help
convince us to let him stay, he promised to teach us to hunt birdies -
he's a long time expert hunter. He tried last fall, but finally said
we'd have to wait til spring. He told us we could learn catching
babies birdies before they could fly good, since it was hopeless to
teach us on adult birdies.

So... spring is FINALLY here and the baby birdies are leaving the
nest. Rocky made good on his promise and he has been coaching me and
momma for the time when some unwary fledgling blunders into our
hunting grounds.

I was beginning to despair, spring is almost over and no fledglings
have come into the yard. Rocky just said it might be the dry weather,
but not to worry, sooner or later we'd get out chance. Two days ago it
finally happened - a BIG fledgling landed on the lawn chair while we
were in the Out with the hoomin. It was HUGE, 10 times as big as most
of the adult birdies that come to the feeder to eat. Rocky told us it
was a baby robin birdie, and sure enough it could just barely fly.

Momma LB spotted it as soon as we came out the door and called dibs,
so I could only crouch down into the hunting stance that Rocky
insisted we perfect. Momma was doing everything just like we'd been
taught, crouched down and sneaking forward a couple steps at a time.

Then the dumb hoomin noticed us and spoiled everything. He yelled, the
birdie took off. I saw right away that Rocky had been right. It could
hardly fly - we COULD catch it. But the hoomin had distracted momma,
she turned to look at him she lost track of the bird.

Now anyone's birdie and I took off in hot pursuit. A couple more leaps
and IT WAS MINE!!! Then I was jerked to a stop - I forgot that the
BIG - DUMB - MEAN - HOOMIN had hooked the long tether to my collar. I
could only watch as the hoomin easily caught the birdie just a few
feet from where I had been yanked to a stop. It would have been sooo
EASY, a clumsy hoomin easily picked it up and put it over the fence.

As if that's not bad enough, now the hoomin is keeping an even closer
eye on us when we're in the Out, so that we don't have much of a
chance to catch the fledgings.

This evening we went out and spotted another fledgling. It was a
little bitty sparrow fledgling and would have been even easier to
catch (though not maybe not exactly sporting). Somehow the dumb bird
had misjudged its landing and it had its empty little head stuck
between two boards. Rocky saw the problem and was about to jump up on
the fence, saying he'd get it loose and let us catch it. But NOOOO,
the DUMB hoomin interferred, AGAIN. He rescued the dumb bird and put
it in a tree on the other side of the fence where we couldn't get to
it.

To make things even WORSE, if that's even POSSIBLE, Rocky says he's
fulfilled his part of the bargain and isn't going to coach our bird
hunting.

SLAVES SHOULD STOP READING NOW - THE REST IS CLASSIFIED "FOR MASTERS
ONLY"

I say we should look for a new hoomin slave. Momma LB says she used to
live on the mean streets and that we should just put up with this one,
since he's pretty well trained in other respects. What do you all
think?

Sammy
channeling through the BIG DUMB MEAN HOOMIN
--
Steve Touchstone,
faithful servant of Sammy, Little Bit and Rocky

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Home Page: http://www.sirinet.net/~stouchst/index.html
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"Steve Touchstone" wrote


Now anyone's birdie and I took off in hot pursuit. A couple more leaps
and IT WAS MINE!!! Then I was jerked to a stop - I forgot that the
BIG - DUMB - MEAN - HOOMIN had hooked the long tether to my collar.

Well, there you go. Exactly what happened to me. Harrumph.


SLAVES SHOULD STOP READING NOW - THE REST IS CLASSIFIED "FOR MASTERS
ONLY"

I say we should look for a new hoomin slave. Momma LB says she used to
live on the mean streets and that we should just put up with this one,
since he's pretty well trained in other respects. What do you all
think?

When I was younger, I considered leaving my hoomin. On the island, where she
lets us come and go as we please, I stayed out for several days at a time
sometimes. Now that I'm getting on in years, I spend more time in our den
with Frank and the hoomin. You might want to look ahead, Sammy. You might
like the thought of a free life now when you are young and energetic, but
when you get on in years, it starts to feel pretty good to have a hoomin
slave who gets you food and everything else you need.

Purrs,
Nikki

"Steve Touchstone" wrote


Now anyone's birdie and I took off in hot pursuit. A couple more leaps
and IT WAS MINE!!! Then I was jerked to a stop - I forgot that the
BIG - DUMB - MEAN - HOOMIN had hooked the long tether to my collar.

Well, there you go. Exactly what happened to me. Harrumph.


SLAVES SHOULD STOP READING NOW - THE REST IS CLASSIFIED "FOR MASTERS
ONLY"

I say we should look for a new hoomin slave. Momma LB says she used to
live on the mean streets and that we should just put up with this one,
since he's pretty well trained in other respects. What do you all
think?

When I was younger, I considered leaving my hoomin. On the island, where she
lets us come and go as we please, I stayed out for several days at a time
sometimes. Now that I'm getting on in years, I spend more time in our den
with Frank and the hoomin. You might want to look ahead, Sammy. You might
like the thought of a free life now when you are young and energetic, but
when you get on in years, it starts to feel pretty good to have a hoomin
slave who gets you food and everything else you need.

Purrs,
Nikki

"Steve Touchstone" wrote


Now anyone's birdie and I took off in hot pursuit. A couple more leaps
and IT WAS MINE!!! Then I was jerked to a stop - I forgot that the
BIG - DUMB - MEAN - HOOMIN had hooked the long tether to my collar.

Well, there you go. Exactly what happened to me. Harrumph.


SLAVES SHOULD STOP READING NOW - THE REST IS CLASSIFIED "FOR MASTERS
ONLY"

I say we should look for a new hoomin slave. Momma LB says she used to
live on the mean streets and that we should just put up with this one,
since he's pretty well trained in other respects. What do you all
think?

When I was younger, I considered leaving my hoomin. On the island, where she
lets us come and go as we please, I stayed out for several days at a time
sometimes. Now that I'm getting on in years, I spend more time in our den
with Frank and the hoomin. You might want to look ahead, Sammy. You might
like the thought of a free life now when you are young and energetic, but
when you get on in years, it starts to feel pretty good to have a hoomin
slave who gets you food and everything else you need.

Purrs,
Nikki

On Sun, 06 June, Sammy wrote:

---------------------snip----------------------
Sammy
channeling through the BIG DUMB MEAN HOOMIN
--
Steve Touchstone,
faithful servant of Sammy, Little Bit and Rocky

Sammy,

I can't think when I've seen a better piece of writing from a
cat's perspective. Sorry to hear that your efforts at learning to
hunt are thus far fruitless. Best of luck in the big out, he can't
always be there in time.

Regards and Purrs,
Sumo (channeling through the bearded one)

On Sun, 06 June, Sammy wrote:

---------------------snip----------------------
Sammy
channeling through the BIG DUMB MEAN HOOMIN
--
Steve Touchstone,
faithful servant of Sammy, Little Bit and Rocky

Sammy,

I can't think when I've seen a better piece of writing from a
cat's perspective. Sorry to hear that your efforts at learning to
hunt are thus far fruitless. Best of luck in the big out, he can't
always be there in time.

Regards and Purrs,
Sumo (channeling through the bearded one)

On Sun, 06 June, Sammy wrote:

---------------------snip----------------------
Sammy
channeling through the BIG DUMB MEAN HOOMIN
--
Steve Touchstone,
faithful servant of Sammy, Little Bit and Rocky

Sammy,

I can't think when I've seen a better piece of writing from a
cat's perspective. Sorry to hear that your efforts at learning to
hunt are thus far fruitless. Best of luck in the big out, he can't
always be there in time.

Regards and Purrs,
Sumo (channeling through the bearded one)

On Sun, 06 Jun 2004 21:01:57 -0500, Steve Touchstone
yodeled:

(snip)

Now anyone's birdie and I took off in hot pursuit. A couple more leaps
and IT WAS MINE!!! Then I was jerked to a stop - I forgot that the
BIG - DUMB - MEAN - HOOMIN had hooked the long tether to my collar. I
could only watch as the hoomin easily caught the birdie just a few
feet from where I had been yanked to a stop. It would have been sooo
EASY, a clumsy hoomin easily picked it up and put it over the fence.
(snip)

LOL. Cue Sweeney Todd: "I HAD HIM! NO, I HAD HIM!"

Theresa
My Blog: http://www.humanitas.blogspot.com
alt.tv.frasier FAQ: http://www.im-listening.net/FAQ/

On Sun, 06 Jun 2004 21:01:57 -0500, Steve Touchstone
yodeled:

(snip)

Now anyone's birdie and I took off in hot pursuit. A couple more leaps
and IT WAS MINE!!! Then I was jerked to a stop - I forgot that the
BIG - DUMB - MEAN - HOOMIN had hooked the long tether to my collar. I
could only watch as the hoomin easily caught the birdie just a few
feet from where I had been yanked to a stop. It would have been sooo
EASY, a clumsy hoomin easily picked it up and put it over the fence.
(snip)

LOL. Cue Sweeney Todd: "I HAD HIM! NO, I HAD HIM!"

Theresa
My Blog: http://www.humanitas.blogspot.com
alt.tv.frasier FAQ: http://www.im-listening.net/FAQ/

On Sun, 06 Jun 2004 21:01:57 -0500, Steve Touchstone
yodeled:

(snip)

Now anyone's birdie and I took off in hot pursuit. A couple more leaps
and IT WAS MINE!!! Then I was jerked to a stop - I forgot that the
BIG - DUMB - MEAN - HOOMIN had hooked the long tether to my collar. I
could only watch as the hoomin easily caught the birdie just a few
feet from where I had been yanked to a stop. It would have been sooo
EASY, a clumsy hoomin easily picked it up and put it over the fence.
(snip)

LOL. Cue Sweeney Todd: "I HAD HIM! NO, I HAD HIM!"

Theresa
My Blog: http://www.humanitas.blogspot.com
alt.tv.frasier FAQ: http://www.im-listening.net/FAQ/