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Is this weird or is it me?



 
 
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  #1  
Old November 10th 07, 07:58 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Lesley
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Posts: 3,700
Default Is this weird or is it me?

Hi all

I have a friend who doesn't like cats.. I am prepared to regard this
as a minor personality defect as long as the person would never be
cruel to a cat and she wouldn't- she's just one of those people who
was reared by d*g things and has never known the joy of cats

I saw her the other day and she mentioned one of her d*g things.
Bascially she lives in London and her d*g things are at her parents
home- they are chiuahuas ( forgive the spelling) anyway she said she
had popped home and the oldest one looked really cute?

Cute I can understand (I have seen pictures and okay I am prepared to
accrpt these are cute d*g things) but why does she suddenly look cute?

She explains the d*g has had most of her lower jaw removed because she
had cancer and "Now her tongue hangs out all the time and its really
cute"

Is it me or what? My first comment was "Can she eat?" and this person
agreed she seems to be eating okay but she does look cute with her
tongue hanging out

I felt a bit sick- I could understand being relieved a loved pet
survived major surgery and was eating but regarding the fact her
tongie now hangs out as "cute" as if this was some sort of bonus!

Is this just me or what?

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs

  #2  
Old November 10th 07, 09:16 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Bettina
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Default Is this weird or is it me?

On 10 Nov., 19:58, Lesley wrote:
Hi all

I have a friend who doesn't like cats.. I am prepared to regard this
as a minor personality defect as long as the person would never be
cruel to a cat and she wouldn't- she's just one of those people who
was reared by d*g things and has never known the joy of cats

I saw her the other day and she mentioned one of her d*g things.
Bascially she lives in London and her d*g things are at her parents
home- they are chiuahuas ( forgive the spelling) anyway she said she
had popped home and the oldest one looked really cute?

Cute I can understand (I have seen pictures and okay I am prepared to
accrpt these are cute d*g things) but why does she suddenly look cute?

She explains the d*g has had most of her lower jaw removed because she
had cancer and "Now her tongue hangs out all the time and its really
cute"

Is it me or what? My first comment was "Can she eat?" and this person
agreed she seems to be eating okay but she does look cute with her
tongue hanging out

I felt a bit sick- I could understand being relieved a loved pet
survived major surgery and was eating but regarding the fact her
tongie now hangs out as "cute" as if this was some sort of bonus!

Is this just me or what?

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs


Maybe this is about psychology.
If your friend is a lot concerned about looks
(her`s or her dog`s), this might show a subconscious
insecurity, which is a problem she should work on.

If this might be the case, no offense meant here,
a lot of people hide their insecurities by keeping a
meticulously pretty (perfect) appearance, she of course
on the outside seems to bother only about the "looks"
of her little sweetheart.

So if the look is the only thing she seems to be interested after
the surgery it means that she is happy that no one will give her
negative
comments which she might not be able to bear.

Deep down, I believe, she most certainly is happy that her doggie
feels ok and can lead a sort of normal life.

I don`t know if I found the right words to explain my point.
Hopefully you understand what I wanted to say.

love
Bettina

  #3  
Old November 10th 07, 10:25 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
[email protected]
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Posts: 3,999
Default Is this weird or is it me?

Lesley wrote:

I saw her the other day and she mentioned one of her d*g things.
Bascially she lives in London and her d*g things are at her parents
home- they are chiuahuas ( forgive the spelling) anyway she said she
had popped home and the oldest one looked really cute?


Cute I can understand (I have seen pictures and okay I am prepared to
accrpt these are cute d*g things) but why does she suddenly look cute?


She explains the d*g has had most of her lower jaw removed because she
had cancer and "Now her tongue hangs out all the time and its really
cute"


Is it me or what? My first comment was "Can she eat?" and this person
agreed she seems to be eating okay but she does look cute with her
tongue hanging out


I felt a bit sick- I could understand being relieved a loved pet
survived major surgery and was eating but regarding the fact her
tongie now hangs out as "cute" as if this was some sort of bonus!


Well, better she think it's cute than that deciding the dog is ugly
and she doesn't like her anymore. Or that she's just horribly upset at
her "disfigurement". Maybe she's just trying to see something positive
about a terrible experience? Maybe it's just relief that her dog
survived?

It doesn't sound that bad to me...

Joyce
  #4  
Old November 10th 07, 11:50 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Lesley
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Posts: 3,700
Default Is this weird or is it me?

On 10 Nov, 13:25, wrote:

Well, better she think it's cute than that deciding the dog is ugly
and she doesn't like her anymore. Or that she's just horribly upset at
her "disfigurement". Maybe she's just trying to see something positive
about a terrible experience? Maybe it's just relief that her dog
survived?


Maybe but it just struck me as odd that she mentioned the dog looked
"really more cute" before telling me about tjhe surgery

If I'd had that done to one of the Furballs I'd be sobbing with relief
that they'd made it through surgery and were eating before saying
anyhting about the cuteness

Then again I am an expert of reactions to trauma? When Mick's sister
called me to say he passed away on Friday night my first comment was
"He can't be dead! I owe him twenty quid!"

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs

  #5  
Old November 11th 07, 12:15 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
[email protected]
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Posts: 3,999
Default Is this weird or is it me?

Lesley wrote:

Maybe but it just struck me as odd that she mentioned the dog looked
"really more cute" before telling me about tjhe surgery


If I'd had that done to one of the Furballs I'd be sobbing with relief
that they'd made it through surgery and were eating before saying
anyhting about the cuteness


Well, the important thing is, did she take care of her animal? Did she
make sure the dog was getting the right care, and that she was as
comfortable as possible? Was your friend there for the dog emotionally,
being comforting and reassuring when needed? Those are the kinds of
things I would judge a person on - for better or worse.

Does it really matter that she told you the story in a rather eccentric
way? Maybe it's hard for her to talk about it, so she had to tell it
backwards? I've done that - when something was especially painful, I've
talked *around* it for a while, until I got up enough nerve, or the other
person asked the right questions, so that I could talk about it directly.

Then again I am an expert of reactions to trauma? When Mick's sister
called me to say he passed away on Friday night my first comment was
"He can't be dead! I owe him twenty quid!"


LOL - sorry to laugh at such a grim story, but that's just such a
normal reaction of denial (ie, "it can't be real"). People react to
tragedy in so many different ways. IMO, as long as they behave in a
caring and considerate manner, I don't think it matters so much what
their first thought is. Was Mick's sister offended?

Hey, at least you didn't say, "He can't be dead, *he* owes *me* 20
quid!"

Joyce
  #6  
Old November 11th 07, 01:51 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Monique Y. Mudama
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Posts: 1,208
Default Is this weird or is it me?

On 2007-11-10, Lesley penned:
Hi all

I have a friend who doesn't like cats.. I am prepared to regard this
as a minor personality defect as long as the person would never be
cruel to a cat and she wouldn't- she's just one of those people who
was reared by d*g things and has never known the joy of cats


I grew up a d*g person. Honestly, I still am more of a d*g person
than cat. But Oscar has changed my life in many ways, not least of
which is appreciating cats more.

She explains the d*g has had most of her lower jaw removed because
she had cancer and "Now her tongue hangs out all the time and its
really cute"

Is it me or what? My first comment was "Can she eat?" and this
person agreed she seems to be eating okay but she does look cute
with her tongue hanging out

I felt a bit sick- I could understand being relieved a loved pet
survived major surgery and was eating but regarding the fact her
tongie now hangs out as "cute" as if this was some sort of bonus!

Is this just me or what?


Two possibilities -- one, your friend is impossibly shallow. Two,
your friend is a good person who cares a lot for her dogs, but she
said it the wrong way, or it's hard to admit how scared she was for
her dog, or how scared she is for what its future would be like, etc.

If her family weren't seriously dedicated pet lovers, they would have
had the dog PTS rather than go through expensive surgery to keep her
alive this way.

So I guess what I'm thinking is, the most charitable interpretation is
that she's a good person who cares about her dog and just said
something a little odd. And hey, maybe the dog does look cute to her.
Who's the one-eyed kitty (her name escapes me right now) that was
saved from the brink of death? A lot of people here commented on how
cute she was because she looked like she was winking all the time.

--
monique, who spoils Oscar unmercifully

pictures: http://www.bounceswoosh.org/rpca
  #7  
Old November 11th 07, 07:19 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Gracecat
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Posts: 60
Default Is this weird or is it me?

On Nov 10, 6:51 pm, "Monique Y. Mudama" wrote:
On 2007-11-10, Lesley penned:

Hi all


I have a friend who doesn't like cats.. I am prepared to regard this
as a minor personality defect as long as the person would never be
cruel to a cat and she wouldn't- she's just one of those people who
was reared by d*g things and has never known the joy of cats


I grew up a d*g person. Honestly, I still am more of a d*g person
than cat. But Oscar has changed my life in many ways, not least of
which is appreciating cats more.

She explains the d*g has had most of her lower jaw removed because
she had cancer and "Now her tongue hangs out all the time and its
really cute"


Is it me or what? My first comment was "Can she eat?" and this
person agreed she seems to be eating okay but she does look cute
with her tongue hanging out


I felt a bit sick- I could understand being relieved a loved pet
survived major surgery and was eating but regarding the fact her
tongie now hangs out as "cute" as if this was some sort of bonus!


Is this just me or what?


Two possibilities -- one, your friend is impossibly shallow. Two,
your friend is a good person who cares a lot for her dogs, but she
said it the wrong way, or it's hard to admit how scared she was for
her dog, or how scared she is for what its future would be like, etc.

If her family weren't seriously dedicated pet lovers, they would have
had the dog PTS rather than go through expensive surgery to keep her
alive this way.

So I guess what I'm thinking is, the most charitable interpretation is
that she's a good person who cares about her dog and just said
something a little odd. And hey, maybe the dog does look cute to her.
Who's the one-eyed kitty (her name escapes me right now) that was
saved from the brink of death? A lot of people here commented on how
cute she was because she looked like she was winking all the time.

--
monique, who spoils Oscar unmercifully

pictures:http://www.bounceswoosh.org/rpca


That would be Helen's wonderful huntress and the belated Frank's
paramour, Waffles.

(I think)

Mutt's as ugly as homemade sin but in a freakish sort of way
absolutely beautiful too. She's got some funky coloration patterns
going on. So I can see making a crack about her but I'm with Lesley
too. Everybody who was around me while Mutt was going through a
serious surgery and post-op knew about it because I was constantly
fretting over her care. But if running into a friend who asked about
my pets a length of time after the health crisis I'd probably remark
on any changes if it affected her looks or personality before
explaining myself fully because Mutt's looks and personality have
always been a subject of discussion among family and friends.

If the surgery took place a few months ago, and she's no longer in a
state of concern for her pet then it's easy to focus on the current
state of things. My leg is no longer broken, and I'm no longer under a
doctor's care so whenever somebody asks, I usually just grump about
the ugly brown discoloration the incision left behind. Because that's
the here and now to the situation that is no longer a situation. If
that makes sense It's an avoidance tactic when you've been
frightened, an apology of sorts for being so grim about it as much as
the person may have been and it doesn't necessarily mean she had to be
tragic with you but after a while personally I start to act positive
because I feel so guilty about being so down all the time about
something if it's bothering me. My broken leg was the end all and be
all for two months. So lately even if I'm having a miserable day from
arthritis I will say something positive about it when asked.

I think as long as she loves her dogs, each reaction to nearly losing
one is different and normal. Unless she would discard the pet if it's
ugly or refuse to care for it, I wouldn't worry about it. Fear and
concern sometimes can make us appear to be very crass creatures.


  #8  
Old November 11th 07, 08:25 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Monique Y. Mudama
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Posts: 1,208
Default Is this weird or is it me?

On 2007-11-11, Gracecat penned:
On Nov 10, 6:51 pm, "Monique Y. Mudama"

wrote:

So I guess what I'm thinking is, the most charitable interpretation
is that she's a good person who cares about her dog and just said
something a little odd. And hey, maybe the dog does look cute to
her. Who's the one-eyed kitty (her name escapes me right now) that
was saved from the brink of death? A lot of people here commented
on how cute she was because she looked like she was winking all the
time.


That would be Helen's wonderful huntress and the belated Frank's
paramour, Waffles.

(I think)


I think I actually meant a kitten -- Lily, maybe?

Mutt's as ugly as homemade sin but in a freakish sort of way
absolutely beautiful too. She's got some funky coloration patterns
going on. So I can see making a crack about her but I'm with Lesley
too. Everybody who was around me while Mutt was going through a
serious surgery and post-op knew about it because I was constantly
fretting over her care. But if running into a friend who asked about
my pets a length of time after the health crisis I'd probably remark
on any changes if it affected her looks or personality before
explaining myself fully because Mutt's looks and personality have
always been a subject of discussion among family and friends.


I think we also tend to assume that everyone we know knows everything
about whatever is currently on our minds, so we may skip to the "news"
instead of giving the full background.

And, memory is a tricky thing. It's kind to us, tends to fade out the
worst.

If the surgery took place a few months ago, and she's no longer in a
state of concern for her pet then it's easy to focus on the current
state of things. My leg is no longer broken, and I'm no longer under
a doctor's care so whenever somebody asks, I usually just grump
about the ugly brown discoloration the incision left behind. Because
that's the here and now to the situation that is no longer a
situation. If that makes sense It's an avoidance tactic when
you've been frightened, an apology of sorts for being so grim about
it as much as the person may have been and it doesn't necessarily
mean she had to be tragic with you but after a while personally I
start to act positive because I feel so guilty about being so down
all the time about something if it's bothering me. My broken leg was
the end all and be all for two months. So lately even if I'm having
a miserable day from arthritis I will say something positive about
it when asked.

I think as long as she loves her dogs, each reaction to nearly
losing one is different and normal. Unless she would discard the pet
if it's ugly or refuse to care for it, I wouldn't worry about it.
Fear and concern sometimes can make us appear to be very crass
creatures.


FWIW, I agree.

--
monique, who spoils Oscar unmercifully

pictures: http://www.bounceswoosh.org/rpca
  #9  
Old November 11th 07, 08:43 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
[email protected]
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Posts: 672
Default Is this weird or is it me?

So I guess what I'm thinking is, the most charitable interpretation is
that she's a good person who cares about her dog and just said
something a little odd. And hey, maybe the dog does look cute to her.
Who's the one-eyed kitty (her name escapes me right now) that was
saved from the brink of death? A lot of people here commented on how
cute she was because she looked like she was winking all the time.////


You're possibly thinking of Miss Lily Whiskers. And she *KNOWS* she's
unbelievably cute. ;o) Seriously, she's convinced that if she sits
still long enough, the world will revolve around her and it frequently
does.

Or, possibly you're thinking of Waffles, belonging to Helen s.

Or even HRFL Tiger, who rules this house with an iron paw.

I suspect the person with the dog is just trying to deal with the fact
her baby had a life threatening illness. People react in different
ways.

Helen M

  #10  
Old November 11th 07, 08:27 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Lesley
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Posts: 3,700
Default Is this weird or is it me?

On 10 Nov, 15:15, wrote:
Well, the important thing is, did she take care of her animal? Did she
make sure the dog was getting the right care, and that she was as
comfortable as possible? Was your friend there for the dog emotionally,
being comforting and reassuring when needed? Those are the kinds of
things I would judge a person on - for better or worse.


Not really the dogs are more her parents dogs and live with them- she
only sees them when she pops home for the weekend


LOL - sorry to laugh at such a grim story,


I don't mind

but that's just such a
normal reaction of denial (ie, "it can't be real"). People react to
tragedy in so many different ways. IMO, as long as they behave in a
caring and considerate manner, I don't think it matters so much what
their first thought is. Was Mick's sister offended?


She just told me to spend the money on flowers for the funeral and
you're right about people saying weird things I was having a drink
with Mick once and I got some news and I stood up and quite calmly
said "Mick I'm really sorry to have to go- please finish my drink for
me- look I am really sorry I have to go I'd much rather sit here and
talk to you but apparently my dad has just died- sorry about this"

I don't remember what I said when my mum died but it was probably
equally inapt but I was at home so I didn't make a fool of myself

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs


 




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