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Warning for cat breeders/show owners!! - long
A warning for our cat breeders/show owners!
Be warned! We have identified a new disease, probably caused by a virus among cat-owning people. It apparently has been in existence for a considerable time, but only recently has anyone identified this disease, and begun to study it. We call it the Acquired Cat Obsessive Syndrome (ACOS). At first, ACOS was originally considered to be psychological in nature, but after two young researchers here suddenly decided to become show breeders, we realized that we were dealing with an infectious agent. Epidemiologists here have identified three stages of this disease and typical symptoms, and they a A. You have the early symptoms (Stage I) if: 1. You think that any show within 300 kilometres is 'near by'. 2. You begin to enjoy getting up at 5 am in the morning to groom and feed your cats. 3. It is fun to spend several hours a day grooming your cats. 4. You think you're being frugal if you spend less than $3,000 a year on cat shows. 5. You can't remember what it was like to have just one cat. B. You definitely have the disease (Stage II) if: 1. Your most important factor when buying a car is how many cat crates you can fit in it. 2. When you look for a house, the first thing you think of is how many cats you can house on the property. 3. Your cat food bill is higher than your family's. 4. You spend as much on veterinarians as on doctors. 5. You have no money because of showing cats at cat shows. 6. You have to buy more than one vehicle a year, because you keep burning out the 7-year or 70,000-mile warranty going to shows. 7. Your have more pictures of the cats than of your family. 8. Your idea of a fun vacation is to hit a cat show circuit. 9. Most of your conversations revolve around the cats. C. You are a terminal case (Stage III) if: 1. You wake up in the morning and find out that you put the kids in the carriers and the cats in the beds last night. 2. You know each cat's name and pedigree, but can't figure out who that stranger in the house is; it turns out to be your husband/wife. 3. Your neighbors keep insisting that those kids running around your house bothering the cats are yours. 4. You keep telling the kids to "come" and can't understand why they won't, and why they keep objecting to the walk leash. 5. You cash in the kid's educational trust fund to campaign the cats. 6. You've been on the road showing cats so long that you can't remember where you live. 7. Your family tells you "It's either the cats or us;" you choose the cats. Do you have this dreaded disease? Well, there is hope. In the course of our research, we have found that most cases seem to stop at Stage II, and remain chronic. We, with great difficulty, managed to acquire several Stage III ACOS patients. They are currently in our isolation wards, where we are studying them to gain a better understanding of this disease. It is a sad sight, seeing these formerly vibrant people as they shuffle around their rooms in endless triangle or L-patterns, making odd hand motions (as if holding a leash and patting a cat), and making chirriping noises. Merely saying the word "Moggie" can send them into an uncontrollable frenzy. Unfortunately, there isn't much hope for these cases, but with time and research to further understand this disease, we hope to come up with a cure. We are now attempting to isolate the causative agent, and may be able to develop a vaccine in the future. An interesting sidelight of this disease seems to be that exposure at an early age has an immunizing effect. Several people afflicted with ACOS at Stage II and Stage III have close family members (children, husbands, wives) who have absolutely no disease. It is thought by some of our researchers that this may be due to environmental effects, to an age- related immune function, or to the fact that those at these stages of the disease tend not to associate with their close family members possibly due to the memory deficit induced by the disease - that is, in that they don't remember that they have close family members! What can you do to prevent this disease? Until a cure is found, prevention is the measure. Avoid catteries advertising "show stock," since it may be that cats are carriers of the disease. Leave town on those days that the local newspapers inform you of a show in the area. If you inadvertently come into contact with an ACOS-afflicted person, leave as soon as possible (they do tend to cling), and thoroughly shower, preferably with germicidal soap. If you are living with an ACOS-afflicted person, take comfort that, if you haven't succumbed yet, you are probably safe. |
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LOL.......
Purrs Angela and Gizmo "Lois Reay" wrote in message ... A warning for our cat breeders/show owners! Be warned! We have identified a new disease, probably caused by a virus among cat-owning people. It apparently has been in existence for a considerable time, but only recently has anyone identified this disease, and begun to study it. We call it the Acquired Cat Obsessive Syndrome (ACOS). At first, ACOS was originally considered to be psychological in nature, but after two young researchers here suddenly decided to become show breeders, we realized that we were dealing with an infectious agent. Epidemiologists here have identified three stages of this disease and typical symptoms, and they a A. You have the early symptoms (Stage I) if: 1. You think that any show within 300 kilometres is 'near by'. 2. You begin to enjoy getting up at 5 am in the morning to groom and feed your cats. 3. It is fun to spend several hours a day grooming your cats. 4. You think you're being frugal if you spend less than $3,000 a year on cat shows. 5. You can't remember what it was like to have just one cat. B. You definitely have the disease (Stage II) if: 1. Your most important factor when buying a car is how many cat crates you can fit in it. 2. When you look for a house, the first thing you think of is how many cats you can house on the property. 3. Your cat food bill is higher than your family's. 4. You spend as much on veterinarians as on doctors. 5. You have no money because of showing cats at cat shows. 6. You have to buy more than one vehicle a year, because you keep burning out the 7-year or 70,000-mile warranty going to shows. 7. Your have more pictures of the cats than of your family. 8. Your idea of a fun vacation is to hit a cat show circuit. 9. Most of your conversations revolve around the cats. C. You are a terminal case (Stage III) if: 1. You wake up in the morning and find out that you put the kids in the carriers and the cats in the beds last night. 2. You know each cat's name and pedigree, but can't figure out who that stranger in the house is; it turns out to be your husband/wife. 3. Your neighbors keep insisting that those kids running around your house bothering the cats are yours. 4. You keep telling the kids to "come" and can't understand why they won't, and why they keep objecting to the walk leash. 5. You cash in the kid's educational trust fund to campaign the cats. 6. You've been on the road showing cats so long that you can't remember where you live. 7. Your family tells you "It's either the cats or us;" you choose the cats. Do you have this dreaded disease? Well, there is hope. In the course of our research, we have found that most cases seem to stop at Stage II, and remain chronic. We, with great difficulty, managed to acquire several Stage III ACOS patients. They are currently in our isolation wards, where we are studying them to gain a better understanding of this disease. It is a sad sight, seeing these formerly vibrant people as they shuffle around their rooms in endless triangle or L-patterns, making odd hand motions (as if holding a leash and patting a cat), and making chirriping noises. Merely saying the word "Moggie" can send them into an uncontrollable frenzy. Unfortunately, there isn't much hope for these cases, but with time and research to further understand this disease, we hope to come up with a cure. We are now attempting to isolate the causative agent, and may be able to develop a vaccine in the future. An interesting sidelight of this disease seems to be that exposure at an early age has an immunizing effect. Several people afflicted with ACOS at Stage II and Stage III have close family members (children, husbands, wives) who have absolutely no disease. It is thought by some of our researchers that this may be due to environmental effects, to an age- related immune function, or to the fact that those at these stages of the disease tend not to associate with their close family members possibly due to the memory deficit induced by the disease - that is, in that they don't remember that they have close family members! What can you do to prevent this disease? Until a cure is found, prevention is the measure. Avoid catteries advertising "show stock," since it may be that cats are carriers of the disease. Leave town on those days that the local newspapers inform you of a show in the area. If you inadvertently come into contact with an ACOS-afflicted person, leave as soon as possible (they do tend to cling), and thoroughly shower, preferably with germicidal soap. If you are living with an ACOS-afflicted person, take comfort that, if you haven't succumbed yet, you are probably safe. |
#3
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ROFMAO! Have been there, done that, lived through those days with dear
friends afflicted with this dread malady. My theory on causative factors a unnatural strength of "ribbon-collecting", "trophy-collecting", and "rosette-collecting", not to mention the addiction to the sounds of audience comments such as "Oh, what a beautiful cat", "Look at those points", "How well-behaved that cat is", and "What a gorgeous coat of fur" in show rings. I myself was only ever slightly infected, having only one pedigreed show-cat (Oliver, RB Oriental Shorthair) but he was such a nervous wreck at shows I retired him after only a few shows; and thereafter, with the friends, exhibiting only HHP (household pets - moggies, or non-pedigreed cats) category. We still *go* to shows these days, but not to compete, only to see different breeds of cats, and talk to people we know from the old days who are still infected with this malady......it is not only a lot of work, but also can be expensive. "Gizela" u wrote in message ... : LOL....... : : Purrs : : Angela and Gizmo : : "Lois Reay" wrote in message : ... : A warning for our cat breeders/show owners! : : Be warned! : : : We have identified a new disease, probably caused by a virus among : cat-owning : people. It apparently has been in existence for a considerable time, but : only : recently has anyone identified this disease, and begun to study it. We : call : it : the Acquired Cat Obsessive Syndrome (ACOS). At first, ACOS was originally : considered to be psychological in nature, but after two young researchers : here : suddenly decided to become show breeders, we realized that we were dealing : with : an infectious agent. Epidemiologists here have identified three stages of : this : disease and typical symptoms, and they a : : A. You have the early symptoms (Stage I) if: : 1. You think that any show within 300 kilometres is 'near by'. : 2. You begin to enjoy getting up at 5 am in the morning to groom and : feed your cats. : 3. It is fun to spend several hours a day grooming your cats. : 4. You think you're being frugal if you spend less than $3,000 : a year on cat shows. : 5. You can't remember what it was like to have just one cat. : : B. You definitely have the disease (Stage II) if: : 1. Your most important factor when buying a car is how many cat crates : you can fit in it. : 2. When you look for a house, the first thing you think of is how : many cats you can house on the property. : 3. Your cat food bill is higher than your family's. : 4. You spend as much on veterinarians as on doctors. : 5. You have no money because of showing cats at cat shows. : 6. You have to buy more than one vehicle a year, because you keep : burning out the 7-year or 70,000-mile warranty going to shows. : 7. Your have more pictures of the cats than of your family. : 8. Your idea of a fun vacation is to hit a cat show circuit. : 9. Most of your conversations revolve around the cats. : : C. You are a terminal case (Stage III) if: : 1. You wake up in the morning and find out that you put the kids in : the carriers and the cats in the beds last night. : 2. You know each cat's name and pedigree, but can't figure out who : that stranger in the house is; it turns out to be your husband/wife. : 3. Your neighbors keep insisting that those kids running around your : house bothering the cats are yours. : 4. You keep telling the kids to "come" and can't understand why they : won't, and why they keep objecting to the walk leash. : 5. You cash in the kid's educational trust fund to campaign the cats. : 6. You've been on the road showing cats so long that you can't : remember where you live. : 7. Your family tells you "It's either the cats or us;" you choose the : cats. : : Do you have this dreaded disease? Well, there is hope. In the course : of our research, we have found that most cases seem to stop at Stage : II, and remain chronic. We, with great difficulty, managed to acquire : several Stage III ACOS patients. They are currently in our isolation : wards, where we are studying them to gain a better understanding of : this disease. It is a sad sight, seeing these formerly vibrant people : as they shuffle around their rooms in endless triangle or L-patterns, : making odd hand motions (as if holding a leash and patting a cat), and : making chirriping noises. Merely saying the word "Moggie" can send : them into an uncontrollable frenzy. : : Unfortunately, there isn't much hope for these cases, but with time : and research to further understand this disease, we hope to come up : with a cure. We are now attempting to isolate the causative agent, : and may be able to develop a vaccine in the future. An interesting : sidelight of this disease seems to be that exposure at an early age : has an immunizing effect. Several people afflicted with ACOS at Stage : II and Stage III have close family members (children, husbands, : wives) who have absolutely no disease. It is thought by some of our : researchers that this may be due to environmental effects, to an age- : related immune function, or to the fact that those at these stages of : the disease tend not to associate with their close family members : possibly due to the memory deficit induced by the disease - that is, : in that they don't remember that they have close family members! : : What can you do to prevent this disease? Until a cure is found, : prevention is the measure. Avoid catteries advertising "show stock," : since it may be that cats are carriers of the disease. Leave town on : those days that the local newspapers inform you of a show in the : area. If you inadvertently come into contact with an ACOS-afflicted : person, leave as soon as possible (they do tend to cling), and : thoroughly shower, preferably with germicidal soap. If you are living : with an ACOS-afflicted person, take comfort that, if you haven't : succumbed yet, you are probably safe. : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : |
#4
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There but for the grace of God.....
The first pet I owned was show perfect. Physically. Fortunately she was also the dumbest poodle on the face of the earth and not capable of the proper attitude. We did manage to breed one exceptional specimen many years later. I made the mistake of letting the vet crop the tail which ruined him for show. A friend who is a victim of the disease nearly cried when she saw him. He turned into an exceptional pet for a man who was confined to home with heart disease so it all worked out for the best. Jo -- "Dogs may have kept us company on the hunt, but it was the cats who insisted we invent houses and discover fire." -- Khiem Tran "Lois Reay" wrote in message ... A warning for our cat breeders/show owners! Be warned! We have identified a new disease, probably caused by a virus among cat-owning people. It apparently has been in existence for a considerable time, but only recently has anyone identified this disease, and begun to study it. We call it the Acquired Cat Obsessive Syndrome (ACOS). At first, ACOS was originally considered to be psychological in nature, but after two young researchers here suddenly decided to become show breeders, we realized that we were dealing with an infectious agent. Epidemiologists here have identified three stages of this disease and typical symptoms, and they a A. You have the early symptoms (Stage I) if: 1. You think that any show within 300 kilometres is 'near by'. 2. You begin to enjoy getting up at 5 am in the morning to groom and feed your cats. 3. It is fun to spend several hours a day grooming your cats. 4. You think you're being frugal if you spend less than $3,000 a year on cat shows. 5. You can't remember what it was like to have just one cat. B. You definitely have the disease (Stage II) if: 1. Your most important factor when buying a car is how many cat crates you can fit in it. 2. When you look for a house, the first thing you think of is how many cats you can house on the property. 3. Your cat food bill is higher than your family's. 4. You spend as much on veterinarians as on doctors. 5. You have no money because of showing cats at cat shows. 6. You have to buy more than one vehicle a year, because you keep burning out the 7-year or 70,000-mile warranty going to shows. 7. Your have more pictures of the cats than of your family. 8. Your idea of a fun vacation is to hit a cat show circuit. 9. Most of your conversations revolve around the cats. C. You are a terminal case (Stage III) if: 1. You wake up in the morning and find out that you put the kids in the carriers and the cats in the beds last night. 2. You know each cat's name and pedigree, but can't figure out who that stranger in the house is; it turns out to be your husband/wife. 3. Your neighbors keep insisting that those kids running around your house bothering the cats are yours. 4. You keep telling the kids to "come" and can't understand why they won't, and why they keep objecting to the walk leash. 5. You cash in the kid's educational trust fund to campaign the cats. 6. You've been on the road showing cats so long that you can't remember where you live. 7. Your family tells you "It's either the cats or us;" you choose the cats. Do you have this dreaded disease? Well, there is hope. In the course of our research, we have found that most cases seem to stop at Stage II, and remain chronic. We, with great difficulty, managed to acquire several Stage III ACOS patients. They are currently in our isolation wards, where we are studying them to gain a better understanding of this disease. It is a sad sight, seeing these formerly vibrant people as they shuffle around their rooms in endless triangle or L-patterns, making odd hand motions (as if holding a leash and patting a cat), and making chirriping noises. Merely saying the word "Moggie" can send them into an uncontrollable frenzy. Unfortunately, there isn't much hope for these cases, but with time and research to further understand this disease, we hope to come up with a cure. We are now attempting to isolate the causative agent, and may be able to develop a vaccine in the future. An interesting sidelight of this disease seems to be that exposure at an early age has an immunizing effect. Several people afflicted with ACOS at Stage II and Stage III have close family members (children, husbands, wives) who have absolutely no disease. It is thought by some of our researchers that this may be due to environmental effects, to an age- related immune function, or to the fact that those at these stages of the disease tend not to associate with their close family members possibly due to the memory deficit induced by the disease - that is, in that they don't remember that they have close family members! What can you do to prevent this disease? Until a cure is found, prevention is the measure. Avoid catteries advertising "show stock," since it may be that cats are carriers of the disease. Leave town on those days that the local newspapers inform you of a show in the area. If you inadvertently come into contact with an ACOS-afflicted person, leave as soon as possible (they do tend to cling), and thoroughly shower, preferably with germicidal soap. If you are living with an ACOS-afflicted person, take comfort that, if you haven't succumbed yet, you are probably safe. |
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Jo Firey wrote:
There but for the grace of God..... The first pet I owned was show perfect. Physically. Fortunately she was also the dumbest poodle on the face of the earth and not capable of the proper attitude. We did manage to breed one exceptional specimen many years later. I made the mistake of letting the vet crop the tail which ruined him for show. A friend who is a victim of the disease nearly cried when she saw him. He turned into an exceptional pet for a man who was confined to home with heart disease so it all worked out for the best. Jo -- "Dogs may have kept us company on the hunt, but it was the cats who insisted we invent houses and discover fire." -- Khiem Tran "Lois Reay" wrote in message ... A warning for our cat breeders/show owners! Be warned! We have identified a new disease, probably caused by a virus among cat-owning people. It apparently has been in existence for a considerable time, but only recently has anyone identified this disease, and begun to study it. We call it the Acquired Cat Obsessive Syndrome (ACOS). At first, ACOS was originally considered to be psychological in nature, but after two young researchers here suddenly decided to become show breeders, we realized that we were dealing with an infectious agent. Epidemiologists here have identified three stages of this disease and typical symptoms, and they a A. You have the early symptoms (Stage I) if: 1. You think that any show within 300 kilometres is 'near by'. 2. You begin to enjoy getting up at 5 am in the morning to groom and feed your cats. 3. It is fun to spend several hours a day grooming your cats. 4. You think you're being frugal if you spend less than $3,000 a year on cat shows. 5. You can't remember what it was like to have just one cat. B. You definitely have the disease (Stage II) if: 1. Your most important factor when buying a car is how many cat crates you can fit in it. 2. When you look for a house, the first thing you think of is how many cats you can house on the property. 3. Your cat food bill is higher than your family's. 4. You spend as much on veterinarians as on doctors. 5. You have no money because of showing cats at cat shows. 6. You have to buy more than one vehicle a year, because you keep burning out the 7-year or 70,000-mile warranty going to shows. 7. Your have more pictures of the cats than of your family. 8. Your idea of a fun vacation is to hit a cat show circuit. 9. Most of your conversations revolve around the cats. C. You are a terminal case (Stage III) if: 1. You wake up in the morning and find out that you put the kids in the carriers and the cats in the beds last night. 2. You know each cat's name and pedigree, but can't figure out who that stranger in the house is; it turns out to be your husband/wife. 3. Your neighbors keep insisting that those kids running around your house bothering the cats are yours. 4. You keep telling the kids to "come" and can't understand why they won't, and why they keep objecting to the walk leash. 5. You cash in the kid's educational trust fund to campaign the cats. 6. You've been on the road showing cats so long that you can't remember where you live. 7. Your family tells you "It's either the cats or us;" you choose the cats. Do you have this dreaded disease? Well, there is hope. In the course of our research, we have found that most cases seem to stop at Stage II, and remain chronic. We, with great difficulty, managed to acquire several Stage III ACOS patients. They are currently in our isolation wards, where we are studying them to gain a better understanding of this disease. It is a sad sight, seeing these formerly vibrant people as they shuffle around their rooms in endless triangle or L-patterns, making odd hand motions (as if holding a leash and patting a cat), and making chirriping noises. Merely saying the word "Moggie" can send them into an uncontrollable frenzy. Unfortunately, there isn't much hope for these cases, but with time and research to further understand this disease, we hope to come up with a cure. We are now attempting to isolate the causative agent, and may be able to develop a vaccine in the future. An interesting sidelight of this disease seems to be that exposure at an early age has an immunizing effect. Several people afflicted with ACOS at Stage II and Stage III have close family members (children, husbands, wives) who have absolutely no disease. It is thought by some of our researchers that this may be due to environmental effects, to an age- related immune function, or to the fact that those at these stages of the disease tend not to associate with their close family members possibly due to the memory deficit induced by the disease - that is, in that they don't remember that they have close family members! What can you do to prevent this disease? Until a cure is found, prevention is the measure. Avoid catteries advertising "show stock," since it may be that cats are carriers of the disease. Leave town on those days that the local newspapers inform you of a show in the area. If you inadvertently come into contact with an ACOS-afflicted person, leave as soon as possible (they do tend to cling), and thoroughly shower, preferably with germicidal soap. If you are living with an ACOS-afflicted person, take comfort that, if you haven't succumbed yet, you are probably safe. I was also afflicted with this dread disease but not for long. Unfortunately I was slave to a pedigree cream persian female by the unlikely name of Sweetie. "Oh, you must show her," everyone gushed. OK, except that grooming Sweetie was like trying to make friends with Jack the Ripper. She had zero tolerance for combing and brushing. After one second the growling began deep in her throat and you knew that you had about a minute to get the job done. Any longer and she exploded into a bad-tempered tizzy of claws and teeth. Her stomach and tail area were completely out of bounds. We arrived at the show, I deposited her in a cage (she screamed diabolically all the time) and then I watched the judging from the balcony. When they got to Sweetie she clung to the cage like a limpet and had to be prised off. She then clawed the judge, the helper to the judge and anyone else she could find. She yelled like a banshee. As I cowered upstairs I heard the judge say "In all my years of judging I have never seen such a bad-tempered cat". Sweetie never won a prize (surprise, surprise). She growled for the rest of the day. When I arrived to take her home she growled at me and striped me for putting her through such indignities. It was a quick and effective cure for a dread disease. Bev -- If you can step on 9 daisies all at once it's Springtime. |
#6
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ROFMAO! Have been there, done that, lived through those days with dear
friends afflicted with this dread malady. My theory on causative factors a unnatural strength of "ribbon-collecting", "trophy-collecting", and "rosette-collecting", not to mention the addiction to the sounds of audience comments such as "Oh, what a beautiful cat", "Look at those points", "How well-behaved that cat is", and "What a gorgeous coat of fur" in show rings. I myself was only ever slightly infected, having only one pedigreed show-cat (Oliver, RB Oriental Shorthair) but he was such a nervous wreck at shows I retired him after only a few shows; and thereafter, with the friends, exhibiting only HHP (household pets - moggies, or non-pedigreed cats) category. We still *go* to shows these days, but not to compete, only to see different breeds of cats, and talk to people we know from the old days who are still infected with this malady......it is not only a lot of work, but also can be expensive. Been there, done that too, with the eldest Grandcat. I personally thought the cat shows were a little too competitive and some of the people decidedly not nice, but that's just me. .. The compliments were nice but I almost snorted when the judge picked up Grandcat and said, "This cat has very nice furnishings." LOL. I only found out later that he was referring to the hair growing out of his ears. My grandfather had pretty nice furnishings, too, I thought. |
#7
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Thanks for the laugh, Sherry!
Best wishes, -- Polonca & Soncek "Sherry " wrote in message ... snipThe compliments were nice but I almost snorted when the judge picked up Grandcat and said, "This cat has very nice furnishings." LOL. I only found out later that he was referring to the hair growing out of his ears. My grandfather had pretty nice furnishings, too, I thought. |
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