The Neighborhood Battle (LONG)

On 18 Sep 2003 01:42:21 GMT, CATherine
wrote:

I am so sorry you are having such a difficult time. I hope the
mediation works for you. A lot of people get mad and defensive when
they are found out doing wrong. Their self esteem is so low they deny
even to themselves they are doing wrong. So they strike out at the one
who brought to their attention. May God bless the furry victims and
help you with your neighborly work.

CATherine

Thanks, Catherine, and I think you are on target about the feelings on
the other side. It's just so sad; if they could only see what is
going on, and accept responsibility, I would think their self-esteem
would be greatly enhanced by knowing they learned something good and
started doing the right thing. I can only hope that can happen.

Ginger-lyn

On 18 Sep 2003 04:29:57 GMT, (Sherry ) wrote:

I'm sorry you're having suuch a rough time with the sorry excuses for humans
that you have for neighbors....but....
YOU GO GIRL. *Someone* has to "speak for those who cannot speak for
themselves." Bless you for having the courage to do that. You keep it up. Is
there a humane society with an abuse team in your town?

Sherry

Thanks, Sherry. I'm not the only one in my neighborhood; my neighbor
in the next block has been dealing with trying to help the animals in
her block for several years now, and is in the same sort of situation,
only worse (her car windows have been smashed and things stolen off
her porch). It is frustrating. There is a Humane Society, but they
are fairly useless, and have only *one* Humane Officer to investigate
abuse complaints :-( It can take days or even weeks to have them come
out and investigate. I wish they were a better help for sure.

Ginger-lyn

On Thu, 18 Sep 2003 02:45:31 -0500, "JHBennett"
wrote:

Ginger-Lyn, it is a sad truism that there are more horse's asses in this
world than horses. I know, I live next to one whom I discovered poisoning
animals, but that is another story.
People, including me, are often very free to give advise when they are
not going to bear the consequences. That's a way of saying that I would
likely deal with the situation more aggressively than you might feel
comfortable with. Whatever course of action you pursue must be something
you can live with, and I think that includes not compromising your
principles. Ammongst all of the other things you have done and plan to do,
might I suggest speaking to a lawyer and determining, if you might have
cause for a civil suit or restraining order, with some of these bad actors.
For sure I wouldn't go into a mediation without a firm idea of what I would
demand of the other party and, if possible, discussing it with an attorney.
It may well be that any such agreement you reach could, in effect, be a
binding contract, having the weight of law.
I, and many others here, wish you the best. Have courage and keep your
wits about you ;-)
Sincerely,
Jack

Thank you, Jack. I know you are right, and I am so sorry about the
horrible neighbor you have. I hope there is legal recourse there to
stop him/her.

Thanks for the suggestion about speaking to an attorney. I may be
able to ask my landlord's ex-wife (who is an attorney who *despises*
Neighbor #1) for some advice. I know I need to have a clear idea of
what I want from the neighbor going into mediation, and I do. I am
sure she will not be willing to do what I wish, but all I can do is
ask.

Thanks for the suggestions and support.

Ginger-lyn

Ginger-lyn Summer wrote:

I have tried to be gentle. I tried for a *long* time to talk to #1
Neighbor, gently, as did a friend of mine. No matter what we said, it
did not change anything. She had excuses for every thing we said.
Had I been able to resolve that situation by talking gently to her, I
would have been very happy. But it didn't work out that way.

I seriously doubt I can get her on my side now. She has even gone so
far as to tell her children that I am "evil". :-( And the only thing
I can in all honesty apologize for is hurting her feelings, as I'm
sure this is what she feels. I am going to think carefully about what
to say, and I am going to be my usual (most of the time!) reasonable,
calm self and hope I can somehow get her to understand that I have not
done these things to hurt her, her children, or the neighbors, but
solely to help the animals.




Of course you have to help the animals, its the right thing to do, and I
like to think any of us would act on their behalf. I can't tell you
what to say (and wouldn't if I could) but think you're right to think it
over carefully, to the point of writing down the main things you want to
say, if necessary. I have to do something of that sort as a rule, as I
have as bad of a short term memory as Rob does.

You'll do fine at your meeting, and we'll all be cheering you on.

Pam S.