A cat forum. CatBanter

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » CatBanter forum » Cat Newsgroups » Cat anecdotes
Site Map Home Register Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

Crass?



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #11  
Old June 30th 08, 03:45 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Sam
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,226
Default Crass?

Christina Websell wrote:
"Sherry" wrote in message
...
Out of respect for KFC, I've started another thread--my comment has
little to do with the intended
topic so I have re-pasted the post into a new thread.

Helen wrote:

FWIW, I didn't read Pat's comment that way - although I can understand
why

you can be a bit wary at the moment due to some of the crass comments
from
some on a.n.other thread about looking after KFC. I read Pat's comment
as
hoping KFC has a lot of good life in her yet, not as an adverse
reflection
on the care you give her.


I didn't read Pat's post as a criticism of the quality of care,
either.

As for MaryL (which I'm fairly sure is the one you're talking
about)...making "crass"
remarks: I didn't see any of that, either. "Crass" by definition
would refer to a remark
that was crude, unrefined, and totally lacking in discrimination or
sensibility.

What I saw was MaryL taking the time to post a suggestion based on
what she knew;
what she had seen possibly save the life of a cat. When her post
wasn't received well,
what *I* saw, was her apologizing all over herself. That is not crass.


FWIW, I don't think Helen was referring to MaryL at all. I certainly didn't
think her posts were "crass" It did upset me a bit to be called
"anti-American" though. Is that how you all perceive me?

Tweed

Not in the least.

Sam, supervised by Mistletoe
  #12  
Old June 30th 08, 04:23 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
CatNipped[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 4,003
Default Crass?

"Christina Websell" wrote in message
...

FWIW, I don't think Helen was referring to MaryL at all. I certainly
didn't think her posts were "crass" It did upset me a bit to be called
"anti-American" though. Is that how you all perceive me?

Tweed


Tweed, there are times when you are very blunt (not a bad thing), and I've
taken umbrage at something you've said about America. While I don't think
of you as "anti-American" at all, I do sometimes think you have a somewhat
distorted view of us (and to give due credit, I think a lot of *Americans*
are to fault for that). The times I've taken umbrage, I've tried to get you
to see that, America being as large and varied as it is, it is often a
mistake to generalize about us (e.g. saying that all Americans are barbaric
because *some* Americans have their cats declawed). That being said, I
would not have as a friend anyone who is "anti-American" - and I count you
as a dear friend even though we may have "words" now and again.

Going back to the "crass" remark, I was thinking it was about the person who
tried to gainsay your vet's advice and proceeded to outline what you should
do with your cat (as if you and your vet were too feeble-minded to do the
right thing for her). It amazes me when someone thinks they can diagnose a
cat they've never seen, from another country, and going only by what a
worried cat-mom says on UseNet. Um, sure, they know more than that person's
vet who has taken care of that cat for years but who must be incompetent
since their diagnosis or advice differs.

BUT, I will say this about most, if not all Americans. We are a "can do"
society who pretty much boot-strapped ourselves to where we are today. Part
of that national ethos is that we always try to find a solution, even to
those problems that don't have one. Very often that comes across to other
countries' people as being nosy, pushy and know-it-all when, in reality, all
it is is an attempt to help set things right - advice given in all sincerity
and earnestness even when it's not necessarily welcomed.

Hugs,

CatNipped


  #13  
Old June 30th 08, 04:48 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
MaryL
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 2,779
Default Crass?


"Christina Websell" wrote in message
...

"Sherry" wrote in message
...
Out of respect for KFC, I've started another thread--my comment has
little to do with the intended
topic so I have re-pasted the post into a new thread.

Helen wrote:

FWIW, I didn't read Pat's comment that way - although I can understand
why

you can be a bit wary at the moment due to some of the crass comments
from
some on a.n.other thread about looking after KFC. I read Pat's comment
as
hoping KFC has a lot of good life in her yet, not as an adverse
reflection
on the care you give her.


I didn't read Pat's post as a criticism of the quality of care,
either.

As for MaryL (which I'm fairly sure is the one you're talking
about)...making "crass"
remarks: I didn't see any of that, either. "Crass" by definition
would refer to a remark
that was crude, unrefined, and totally lacking in discrimination or
sensibility.

What I saw was MaryL taking the time to post a suggestion based on
what she knew;
what she had seen possibly save the life of a cat. When her post
wasn't received well,
what *I* saw, was her apologizing all over herself. That is not crass.


FWIW, I don't think Helen was referring to MaryL at all. I certainly
didn't think her posts were "crass" It did upset me a bit to be called
"anti-American" though. Is that how you all perceive me?

Tweed



What CatNipped said helps to explain part of what was in my own thought
process. For example, you have said that Americans care more about their
furniture than about their cats. That is painting us with a pretty broad
brush. Unfortunately, there *are* people in this country who declaw their
cats -- a truly barbariac practic, in my opinion -- but there are far more
who do not. We have cases of animal cruelty, but we also have many people
who truly love their animals and will do everything within their power to
take good care of their pets. You even talked about how Americans don't
know anything about other nations but seemed to feel that Europeans do know
a great deal about us. In reality, there are so many cultural differences
that people on *both* sides probably make assumptions that should not be
made. My roommate in college was a Fulbright Scholar from Germany. I
remember her making a disparaging remark about Britain, and I challenged her
on it because I just don't think that anyone should try to place an entire
society in one kettle. Incidentally, she is a *very good friend,* so my
"challenge" was really a discussion. The current discussions in this NG are
rather ironic because I have always had great admiration and respect for the
British (if I can now break my own rule -- but this does not mean that I
think everyone in England acts alike any more than I would accept statements
about all Americans act alike). My ancestors came from England, and one of
my emphases in college was on the British political system. So, I really
regret bringing this up in a thread about KFC, but that may help to explain
what was on my mind. I certainly was not "flaunting" anything when I
suggested fluids. I was operating on what I have done in the past for my
own cats, and I was not aware that you would not be able to do the same.

MaryL

  #14  
Old June 30th 08, 10:45 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Christina Websell
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 8,983
Default Crass?


"CatNipped" wrote in message
...
"Christina Websell" wrote in message
...

FWIW, I don't think Helen was referring to MaryL at all. I certainly
didn't think her posts were "crass" It did upset me a bit to be called
"anti-American" though. Is that how you all perceive me?

Tweed


Tweed, there are times when you are very blunt (not a bad thing), and I've
taken umbrage at something you've said about America. While I don't think
of you as "anti-American" at all, I do sometimes think you have a somewhat
distorted view of us (and to give due credit, I think a lot of *Americans*
are to fault for that). The times I've taken umbrage, I've tried to get
you to see that, America being as large and varied as it is, it is often a
mistake to generalize about us (e.g. saying that all Americans are
barbaric because *some* Americans have their cats declawed). That being
said, I would not have as a friend anyone who is "anti-American" - and I
count you as a dear friend even though we may have "words" now and again.


Ah I knew you would say that, Lori! I don't remember saying that *all*
Americans were barbaric, though, only that as a first world country etc
etc..
No doubt we will disagree again but I count you are a dear friend too.

Going back to the "crass" remark, I was thinking it was about the person
who tried to gainsay your vet's advice and proceeded to outline what you
should do with your cat (as if you and your vet were too feeble-minded to
do the right thing for her). It amazes me when someone thinks they can
diagnose a cat they've never seen, from another country, and going only by
what a worried cat-mom says on UseNet. Um, sure, they know more than that
person's vet who has taken care of that cat for years but who must be
incompetent since their diagnosis or advice differs.

BUT, I will say this about most, if not all Americans. We are a "can do"
society who pretty much boot-strapped ourselves to where we are today.
Part of that national ethos is that we always try to find a solution, even
to those problems that don't have one. Very often that comes across to
other countries' people as being nosy, pushy and know-it-all when, in
reality, all it is is an attempt to help set things right - advice given
in all sincerity and earnestness even when it's not necessarily welcomed.

I know that. I do appreciate and welcome advice, but often what is possible
in America isn't here. When I try and explain it doesn't seem to be an
option, then I mean it really isn't here in Britain.
I am not going to drive KFC all over England to find a vet that will agree
to give her more fluids. For what purpose? To keep her going along for 6
weeks until she needs them again? If my vet says don't do it, don't spend
another $500 like you just did for her fluids, I guess I have to accept it.

She is being kept very comfortable with fantastic food, nice beds, any meds
she needs, but no radical intervention. I have chosen that for her. If I
ever get as old as she is in human years and with her health difficulties I
hope someone is there to make the same decision for me.
She's as bright as a button at the moment.

Tweed






  #15  
Old June 30th 08, 11:05 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
CatNipped[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 4,003
Default Crass?

"Christina Websell" wrote in message
...

"CatNipped" wrote in message
...
"Christina Websell" wrote in message
...

FWIW, I don't think Helen was referring to MaryL at all. I certainly
didn't think her posts were "crass" It did upset me a bit to be called
"anti-American" though. Is that how you all perceive me?

Tweed


Tweed, there are times when you are very blunt (not a bad thing), and
I've taken umbrage at something you've said about America. While I don't
think of you as "anti-American" at all, I do sometimes think you have a
somewhat distorted view of us (and to give due credit, I think a lot of
*Americans* are to fault for that). The times I've taken umbrage, I've
tried to get you to see that, America being as large and varied as it is,
it is often a mistake to generalize about us (e.g. saying that all
Americans are barbaric because *some* Americans have their cats
declawed). That being said, I would not have as a friend anyone who is
"anti-American" - and I count you as a dear friend even though we may
have "words" now and again.


Ah I knew you would say that, Lori! I don't remember saying that *all*
Americans were barbaric, though, only that as a first world country etc
etc..
No doubt we will disagree again but I count you are a dear friend too.

Going back to the "crass" remark, I was thinking it was about the person
who tried to gainsay your vet's advice and proceeded to outline what you
should do with your cat (as if you and your vet were too feeble-minded to
do the right thing for her). It amazes me when someone thinks they can
diagnose a cat they've never seen, from another country, and going only
by what a worried cat-mom says on UseNet. Um, sure, they know more than
that person's vet who has taken care of that cat for years but who must
be incompetent since their diagnosis or advice differs.

BUT, I will say this about most, if not all Americans. We are a "can do"
society who pretty much boot-strapped ourselves to where we are today.
Part of that national ethos is that we always try to find a solution,
even to those problems that don't have one. Very often that comes across
to other countries' people as being nosy, pushy and know-it-all when, in
reality, all it is is an attempt to help set things right - advice given
in all sincerity and earnestness even when it's not necessarily welcomed.

I know that. I do appreciate and welcome advice, but often what is
possible in America isn't here. When I try and explain it doesn't seem to
be an option, then I mean it really isn't here in Britain.
I am not going to drive KFC all over England to find a vet that will agree
to give her more fluids. For what purpose? To keep her going along for
6 weeks until she needs them again? If my vet says don't do it, don't
spend another $500 like you just did for her fluids, I guess I have to
accept it.

She is being kept very comfortable with fantastic food, nice beds, any
meds she needs, but no radical intervention. I have chosen that for her.
If I ever get as old as she is in human years and with her health
difficulties I hope someone is there to make the same decision for me.
She's as bright as a button at the moment.

Tweed


I have ABSOLUTELY not doubts that you will do what is best for KFC. As much
as we all here love her and would like to see her with us for years to come,
there really is nobody else on earth who loves her as much as you do and
only you have the right to make decisions about her treatment. You have
done and will do everything possible to make her life (and its passing) the
best possible - anybody who says differently will have me to contend with.

We're still purring for everything to come out well for the both of you.

Hugs,

CatNipped


  #16  
Old June 30th 08, 11:32 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 9,349
Default Crass?

CatNipped wrote:

BUT, I will say this about most, if not all Americans. We are a "can do"
society who pretty much boot-strapped ourselves to where we are today.


Yep, and that expectation has strangled many a person who is unable to
succeed at "bootstrapping". The downside to "can-do" is if you happen to
be someone who "can't", than you're at fault. Take, for example, the
state of being poor. Much is made in this country about the "self-made
man", who brought himself up from the bottom and is now wealthy and
successful. He might get a lot of publicity, but in reality, there are
very, very, very *few* such people. Most people do the best they can, but
in a society that doesn't do very much to offer help to people in need
(since, after all, we're all supposed succeed on our own), they often
don't get far. And then they're blamed for being unsuccessful. Feh!

--
Joyce - one of the many diverse Americans with diverse opinions


To email me, remove the triple-X from my user name. ^..^
  #17  
Old July 1st 08, 01:27 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Yowie
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 3,225
Default Crass?

There are certain folks who tend to lurk in this NG who occasionally post
when a cat & slave are in a difficult situation.

My opinion of said folk is that they know alot about cats, but don't know a
heck of alot about human beings.

By all means read what they have to say - they do know about cats, but
don't feel guilty (and don't let them make you feel guilty) that the path
you choose for you & those in your care is different from theirs. They
aren't God and have no right to judge you & your life.

I have faith that everyone here will make decisions that they think are the
best path through complicated and conflicting priorities. I may not have
made the same decisions, but I can't imagine anyone here not taking 'the
best interests of the cat, given the circumstances' into account when they
make the hard decisions.

Yowie


  #18  
Old July 1st 08, 02:16 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Christina Websell
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 8,983
Default Crass?


"Yowie" wrote in message
...
There are certain folks who tend to lurk in this NG who occasionally post
when a cat & slave are in a difficult situation.

My opinion of said folk is that they know alot about cats, but don't know
a heck of alot about human beings.

By all means read what they have to say - they do know about cats, but
don't feel guilty (and don't let them make you feel guilty) that the path
you choose for you & those in your care is different from theirs. They
aren't God and have no right to judge you & your life.

I have faith that everyone here will make decisions that they think are
the best path through complicated and conflicting priorities. I may not
have made the same decisions, but I can't imagine anyone here not taking
'the best interests of the cat, given the circumstances' into account when
they make the hard decisions.

I've made my decision. As much as am prepared to spend big money for
veterinary treatment for KFC, if my vet says it's pointless, as much as
don't want to hear it, I know he is right. She is twenty--mumble- years
old, she has multiple health problems. I will take care of her as long as
she lives but I will not subject her any longer to more veterinary tests.
We've done that, we know what's wrong. It's not anything that can be done
about.

Tweed



  #19  
Old July 1st 08, 04:16 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Yowie
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 3,225
Default Crass?

Christina Websell wrote:
"Yowie" wrote in message
...
There are certain folks who tend to lurk in this NG who occasionally
post when a cat & slave are in a difficult situation.

My opinion of said folk is that they know alot about cats, but don't
know a heck of alot about human beings.

By all means read what they have to say - they do know about cats,
but don't feel guilty (and don't let them make you feel guilty) that
the path you choose for you & those in your care is different from
theirs. They aren't God and have no right to judge you & your life.

I have faith that everyone here will make decisions that they think
are the best path through complicated and conflicting priorities. I
may not have made the same decisions, but I can't imagine anyone
here not taking 'the best interests of the cat, given the
circumstances' into account when they make the hard decisions.

I've made my decision. As much as am prepared to spend big money for
veterinary treatment for KFC, if my vet says it's pointless, as much
as don't want to hear it, I know he is right. She is twenty--mumble-
years old, she has multiple health problems. I will take care of
her as long as she lives but I will not subject her any longer to
more veterinary tests. We've done that, we know what's wrong. It's
not anything that can be done about.


I know, hon, its so sad. Given your circumstances, I'd do the same thing
myself. You are the person who knows KFC the best, and you alone knows what
is best for her (even whilst wishing it were otherwise). I'm really sorry if
anyone has made you doubt yourself on this, it just makes such decisions
that much harder.

{{{{{Christina}}}}}


  #20  
Old July 2nd 08, 02:02 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Baha via CatKB.com
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 574
Default Crass?

Christina Websell wrote:

FWIW, I don't think Helen was referring to MaryL at all. I certainly didn't
think her posts were "crass" It did upset me a bit to be called
"anti-American" though. Is that how you all perceive me?


Oh HELL no! I've never inferred anything anti-American, anywhere from you. I
don't blame you for wanting to pull your hair out at what may have been
certain comments suggesting that we can do things in the US that a person in
the UK can not do. "Well, we can do this" is counterproductive to the problem
at hand: giving much-needed support to someone faced with medical and ethical
dilemmas surrounding the care of a loved one. And I don't think that anyone
was being smug about the differences in laws in the US versus the UK, either;
we all just needed to get back to the business at hand, which is your
situation. You just needed to vent, and who doesn't every now and again? It's
not anti-American to just let it all hang out, spit and hiss a bit and get it
out of your system!

Blessed be,
Baha

--
Message posted via CatKB.com
http://www.catkb.com/Uwe/Forums.aspx...dotes/200807/1

 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 11:13 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ©2004-2024 CatBanter.
The comments are property of their posters.