Purrleese! A cat of manners would not sniff a laydee *there!*

wafflycat wrote:
Marble can run very quickly when he wants to.

Ninja-hen1: Marble 0

A-hahahahahaha! Thanks for the story, Helen. I can just picture it.

--
Marina, Miranda and Caliban. In loving memory of Frank and Nikki.

I need to speak to you, Helen and can't through on private mail.

Tweed
"wafflycat" wrote in message
...
*chortle*

I was in the garden for a while so I let The Laydeez out of their run so
they could free-range the garden under supervision with a wary eye out for
Mr Fox. I put out a dish of steamed sweetcorn niblets for the girls. Boy,
do they like sweetcorn... It's warm, I mix layers' mash in with it. The
Laydeez love it as a treat between digging for worms, slugs... *things
devoid of backbone*

Anyhow, I have a cat who has one brain cell and that one brain cell is
devoted to food: Marble.

Marble wanders into the garden from the house. Marble sees two hens
gorging themselves on food. Marble thinks, "They're eating. There must be
something for me there. Investigate. Look nonchalant and they'll never see
me"

So Marble adopts his best 'casual sneaking up in a sideways format' pose,
trying to look uninterested but failing miserably.

The Laydeez carry on pecking and eating sweetcorn whilst making many happy
hen sounds, utterly ignoring Marble.

Marble works his way to a about foot from Cathode and behind her.

Have I mentioned feline fascination for feathery hen bottoms? The hen
bottom is an amazing thing. It is, to put it bluntly, prehensile. It looks
like a mouth and it moves... I'm almost certain it's a separate lifeform
tagged on to the back of the hen as an evolutionary afterthought.

Marble spots a talking bottom. A feathery talking bottom. He is distracted
from the thought of food by a talking bottom a foot from his face.

He decides to investigate the talking butthole.

So he squats down and he is eye to err, eye...

He sticks his nose out.

He sniffs.

There is a cluck.

He sniffs again.

There is a 'squawk' combined with a small leap of a surprised nature. The
thing that 'squawked' then turned a beady eye in the direction of Marble
the bum bandit and gave what sounded like a 'tut-tut' noise. A "Manners! A
gentleman would never sniff a laydee *there*!!"

Marble, never the brightest of Bast's creations, does a full on nose up
the bum jobbie.

Cue feathered leap, ninja-stylee, with swift mid-air turn and the end of a
beak jabbed on the end of the very nose that had been placed, uninvited,
in a private part of feathery bloomers.

Marble can run very quickly when he wants to.

Ninja-hen1: Marble 0

On Jun 18, 10:52 am, "wafflycat"
wrote:
*chortle*

I was in the garden for a while so I let The Laydeez out of their run so
they could free-range the garden under supervision with a wary eye out for
Mr Fox. I put out a dish of steamed sweetcorn niblets for the girls. Boy, do
they like sweetcorn... It's warm, I mix layers' mash in with it. The Laydeez
love it as a treat between digging for worms, slugs... *things devoid of
backbone*

Anyhow, I have a cat who has one brain cell and that one brain cell is
devoted to food: Marble.

Marble wanders into the garden from the house. Marble sees two hens gorging
themselves on food. Marble thinks, "They're eating. There must be something
for me there. Investigate. Look nonchalant and they'll never see me"

So Marble adopts his best 'casual sneaking up in a sideways format' pose,
trying to look uninterested but failing miserably.

The Laydeez carry on pecking and eating sweetcorn whilst making many happy
hen sounds, utterly ignoring Marble.

Marble works his way to a about foot from Cathode and behind her.

Have I mentioned feline fascination for feathery hen bottoms? The hen bottom
is an amazing thing. It is, to put it bluntly, prehensile. It looks like a
mouth and it moves... I'm almost certain it's a separate lifeform tagged on
to the back of the hen as an evolutionary afterthought.

Marble spots a talking bottom. A feathery talking bottom. He is distracted
from the thought of food by a talking bottom a foot from his face.

He decides to investigate the talking butthole.

So he squats down and he is eye to err, eye...

He sticks his nose out.

He sniffs.

There is a cluck.

He sniffs again.

There is a 'squawk' combined with a small leap of a surprised nature. The
thing that 'squawked' then turned a beady eye in the direction of Marble the
bum bandit and gave what sounded like a 'tut-tut' noise. A "Manners! A
gentleman would never sniff a laydee *there*!!"

Marble, never the brightest of Bast's creations, does a full on nose up the
bum jobbie.

Cue feathered leap, ninja-stylee, with swift mid-air turn and the end of a
beak jabbed on the end of the very nose that had been placed, uninvited, in
a private part of feathery bloomers.

Marble can run very quickly when he wants to.

Ninja-hen1: Marble 0

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Lesson to be learned....NEVER sitck your nose up a chicken's
cloaca....

I almost wished for an egg to pop out....but this was FUNNY!!

Thanks for the laugh...

Kristi

Will never think of a hens bottom in the same way again!! What a hoot, made
my day!!! Thanks :-)

Mischief wrote:
On Jun 18, 10:52 am, "wafflycat"
wrote:
*chortle*

[quoted text clipped - 55 lines]

Ninja-hen1: Marble 0

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Lesson to be learned....NEVER sitck your nose up a chicken's
cloaca....

I almost wished for an egg to pop out....but this was FUNNY!!

Thanks for the laugh...

Kristi

--
Message posted via CatKB.com
http://www.catkb.com/Uwe/Forums.aspx...dotes/200806/1

"Christina Websell" wrote in message
...
I need to speak to you, Helen and can't through on private mail.

Tweed
"wafflycat" wrote in message
...
*chortle*

wafflycat


at


then the domain is

£btco*nn£ect.com

just remove all the £ and * from the domain and you'll have my correct addy

"Tish" wrote in message
...

The girls - Marie Curie, Rosalind Franklin and Jane Goodall (egg-
heads, every one!) are so much fun and producing nicely considering
they're just youngsters. I'm glad we have them.

Tish

..jpgs?