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#1
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Goodbye
As I expect you remember I posted a humorous little article a month or two ago, and was immediately attacked by Gandalf. Technically, I suppose, the attack was on my wife. One reason given for this unprovoked attack was that Gandalf had suffered a loss. We have all lost cats, or dogs or family members. It is not acceptable to be rude to someone else because we have had a loss. I was very upset. I still feel upset well over a month later at this scurrilous and unprovoked attack. When I indicated how upset I was, a minority of people though Gandalf's attack was acceptable, some because Gandalf had suffered a loss. Yowie said I was mean-spirited to be so upset. I did not want to do anything quickly so I have left it for over a month to see how I felt. What do I feel? First, I could never post another anecdote here. I would have no idea whether someone would attack me, perhaps "because they had had a loss". Second, I am almost more shocked at Yowie than the original attack. Being so upset that I have been in tears having read it does not seem "mean-spirited". I suppose Yowie is merely blaming the victim which seems all the rage these days but I see no reason to blame victims. Third, since I have not felt like reading here since, I expect not reading this NG will not be the end of the world. While I have enjoyed many many articles here, the only loss i really feel from not reading the articles is not reading Mark Edward's articles. I see he is on Facebook: I do hope he will post articles there as much as possible. Of course I shall regret going. I was reading rec.pets.cats before RPCA was ever invented. At least I can re-read the hundreds of articles on my site, plus the hundreds more I have collected but not yet put on my Storypage. They will get there in time. If anyone nice wants to communicate with me I can be found on Facebook. I remember the years when I had more time and tried to greet everyone with my welcome letter and the standard letters I had for specific problems, like a lost cat. I used to send them out, and enjoyed it. Sadly, I have had less time for NGs and had to stop that. Of course I also remember the bad times: the worst article I ever read here was a long article praising "our" country and "our" soldiers and the fact that "we" are the best country in the world and went on in this vein. The author was so insensitive on an international NG that she never mentioned the country. Amazing. I was also attacked for giving my standard letters to the NG when I felt I had no longer the time to keep sending them out. I never understood that. I was very sad that when Flippy and I both had web sites with many many stories and the search for a lost cat made the national media in New Zealand they were told all about Flippy's page but not mine. But nothing had quite prepared me for an unjustified attack because of a little story about Nico or Nemo. I shall post no more stories about them: I shall read no more. Of course this NG was also noticeably less friendly and supportive than in the days when every second day there was a story by Dave Yehudah, whom I had the privilege of meeting twice in Los Angeles, and who has many stories on my Storypage. If people want this NG to continue I suggest you should discourage the nasty people, not encourage them, and accept everyone has losses, but they do not justify rudeness. Ok, Gandalf, Yowie, you have seen me off. Good-bye. -- David Stevenson Storypage: http://blakjak.org/sty_menu.htm Liverpool, England, UK Emails welcome Nico: SI Vp B 0.6 Y++ L-- W C+++ I+++ T+ A+ E++ H S+ V+ F- Q P+ B+ PA PL- SC+ Nemo: SI Vp B 0.6 Y++ L-- W C+++ I+++ T A+ E++ H S+ V+ F- Q P B+ PA PL- SC+ |
#2
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Goodbye
On Feb 1, 12:35*pm, David Stevenson wrote:
.. *At least I can re-read the hundreds of articles on my site, plus the hundreds more I have collected but not yet put on my Storypage. *They will get there in time. *If anyone nice wants to communicate with me I can be found on Facebook. I am sorry that you have decided this- I shall miss your stories but see you on FB Lesley Slave of the Fabulous Furballs |
#3
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Goodbye
On Feb 1, 12:35*pm, David Stevenson wrote:
* *As I expect you remember I posted a humorous little article a month or two ago, and was immediately attacked by Gandalf. *Technically, I suppose, the attack was on my wife. *One reason given for this unprovoked attack was that Gandalf had suffered a loss. * *We have all lost cats, or dogs or family members. *It is not acceptable to be rude to someone else because we have had a loss. * *I was very upset. *I still feel upset well over a month later at this scurrilous and unprovoked attack. *When I indicated how upset I was, a minority of people though Gandalf's attack was acceptable, some because Gandalf had suffered a loss. *Yowie said I was mean-spirited to be so upset. * *I did not want to do anything quickly so I have left it for over a month to see how I felt. *What do I feel? * *First, I could never post another anecdote here. *I would have no idea whether someone would attack me, perhaps "because they had had a loss". * *Second, I am almost more shocked at Yowie than the original attack.. Being so upset that I have been in tears having read it does not seem "mean-spirited". *I suppose Yowie is merely blaming the victim which seems all the rage these days but I see no reason to blame victims. * *Third, since I have not felt like reading here since, I expect not reading this NG will not be the end of the world. *While I have enjoyed many many articles here, the only loss i really feel from not reading the articles is not reading Mark Edward's articles. *I see he is on Facebook: I do hope he will post articles there as much as possible. * *Of course I shall regret going. *I was reading rec.pets.cats before RPCA was ever invented. *At least I can re-read the hundreds of articles on my site, plus the hundreds more I have collected but not yet put on my Storypage. *They will get there in time. *If anyone nice wants to communicate with me I can be found on Facebook. * *I remember the years when I had more time and tried to greet everyone with my welcome letter and the standard letters I had for specific problems, like a lost cat. *I used to send them out, and enjoyed it. Sadly, I have had less time for NGs and had to stop that. *Of course I also remember the bad times: the worst article I ever read here was a long article praising "our" country and "our" soldiers and the fact that "we" are the best country in the world and went on in this vein. *The author was so insensitive on an international NG that she never mentioned the country. *Amazing. * *I was also attacked for giving my standard letters to the NG when I felt I had no longer the time to keep sending them out. *I never understood that. * *I was very sad that when Flippy and I both had web sites with many many stories and the search for a lost cat made the national media in New Zealand they were told all about Flippy's page but not mine. * *But nothing had quite prepared me for an unjustified attack because of a little story about Nico or Nemo. *I shall post no more stories about them: I shall read no more. * *Of course this NG was also noticeably less friendly and supportive than in the days when every second day there was a story by Dave Yehudah, whom I had the privilege of meeting twice in Los Angeles, and who has many stories on my Storypage. *If people want this NG to continue I suggest you should discourage the nasty people, not encourage them, and accept everyone has losses, but they do not justify rudeness. * *Ok, Gandalf, Yowie, you have seen me off. *Good-bye. -- David Stevenson * * * * * *Storypage:http://blakjak.org/sty_menu.htm Liverpool, England, UK * * *Emails welcome Nico: SI Vp B 0.6 Y++ L-- W C+++ I+++ T+ A+ E++ H S+ V+ F- Q P+ B+ PA PL- SC+ Nemo: SI Vp B 0.6 Y++ L-- W C+++ I+++ T *A+ E++ H S+ V+ F- Q P *B+ PA PL- SC+ I'm sorry that you've made this decision David, I can understand why things have piled up and left you feeling unappreciated, after all that you've done for everyone here. I just wish that you could see that there still is some good here. I also think that you misread Yowie's comments, she would never hurt you deliberately, but that's between the two of you. Love Jeanette |
#4
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Goodbye
David Stevenson wrote in
: As I expect you remember I posted a humorous little article a month or two ago, and was immediately attacked by Gandalf. Technically, I suppose, the attack was on my wife. One reason given for this unprovoked attack was that Gandalf had suffered a loss. We have all lost cats, or dogs or family members. It is not acceptable to be rude to someone else because we have had a loss. I was very upset. I still feel upset well over a month later at this scurrilous and unprovoked attack. When I indicated how upset I was, a minority of people though Gandalf's attack was acceptable, some because Gandalf had suffered a loss. Yowie said I was mean-spirited to be so upset. I did not want to do anything quickly so I have left it for over a month to see how I felt. What do I feel? First, I could never post another anecdote here. I would have no idea whether someone would attack me, perhaps "because they had had a loss". Second, I am almost more shocked at Yowie than the original attack. Being so upset that I have been in tears having read it does not seem "mean-spirited". I suppose Yowie is merely blaming the victim which seems all the rage these days but I see no reason to blame victims. Third, since I have not felt like reading here since, I expect not reading this NG will not be the end of the world. While I have enjoyed many many articles here, the only loss i really feel from not reading the articles is not reading Mark Edward's articles. I see he is on Facebook: I do hope he will post articles there as much as possible. Of course I shall regret going. I was reading rec.pets.cats before RPCA was ever invented. At least I can re-read the hundreds of articles on my site, plus the hundreds more I have collected but not yet put on my Storypage. They will get there in time. If anyone nice wants to communicate with me I can be found on Facebook. I remember the years when I had more time and tried to greet everyone with my welcome letter and the standard letters I had for specific problems, like a lost cat. I used to send them out, and enjoyed it. Sadly, I have had less time for NGs and had to stop that. Of course I also remember the bad times: the worst article I ever read here was a long article praising "our" country and "our" soldiers and the fact that "we" are the best country in the world and went on in this vein. The author was so insensitive on an international NG that she never mentioned the country. Amazing. I was also attacked for giving my standard letters to the NG when I felt I had no longer the time to keep sending them out. I never understood that. I was very sad that when Flippy and I both had web sites with many many stories and the search for a lost cat made the national media in New Zealand they were told all about Flippy's page but not mine. But nothing had quite prepared me for an unjustified attack because of a little story about Nico or Nemo. I shall post no more stories about them: I shall read no more. Of course this NG was also noticeably less friendly and supportive than in the days when every second day there was a story by Dave Yehudah, whom I had the privilege of meeting twice in Los Angeles, and who has many stories on my Storypage. If people want this NG to continue I suggest you should discourage the nasty people, not encourage them, and accept everyone has losses, but they do not justify rudeness. Ok, Gandalf, Yowie, you have seen me off. Good-bye. I find attacks on here regrettable. The world doesn't need more grief. See you on FB! Bobble |
#5
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Goodbye
David Stevenson wrote: Ok, Gandalf, Yowie, you have seen me off. Good-bye. Well, only you can judge your degree of "upset", but I cannot IMAGINE being that disturbed over an internet comment (or even several) from people I've never even MET!!!! You don't know them, they don't know you, and written words are much easier to misinterpret than those spoken face-to-face. (For that matter, even face-to-face, unintended misunderstandings can arise.) Some of the older and more cautious among us avoid the "social networks" such as Facebook like the plague (for good reason, if we value what the internet has let us retain of our privacy). Hopefully you'll miss rpca enough to visit once in a while. |
#6
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Goodbye
"David Stevenson" wrote in message
... As I expect you remember I posted a humorous little article a month or two ago, and was immediately attacked by Gandalf. Technically, I suppose, the attack was on my wife. One reason given for this unprovoked attack was that Gandalf had suffered a loss. We have all lost cats, or dogs or family members. It is not acceptable to be rude to someone else because we have had a loss. I was very upset. I still feel upset well over a month later at this scurrilous and unprovoked attack. When I indicated how upset I was, a minority of people though Gandalf's attack was acceptable, some because Gandalf had suffered a loss. Yowie said I was mean-spirited to be so upset. I did not want to do anything quickly so I have left it for over a month to see how I felt. What do I feel? First, I could never post another anecdote here. I would have no idea whether someone would attack me, perhaps "because they had had a loss". Second, I am almost more shocked at Yowie than the original attack. Being so upset that I have been in tears having read it does not seem "mean-spirited". I suppose Yowie is merely blaming the victim which seems all the rage these days but I see no reason to blame victims. Third, since I have not felt like reading here since, I expect not reading this NG will not be the end of the world. While I have enjoyed many many articles here, the only loss i really feel from not reading the articles is not reading Mark Edward's articles. I see he is on Facebook: I do hope he will post articles there as much as possible. Of course I shall regret going. I was reading rec.pets.cats before RPCA was ever invented. At least I can re-read the hundreds of articles on my site, plus the hundreds more I have collected but not yet put on my Storypage. They will get there in time. If anyone nice wants to communicate with me I can be found on Facebook. I remember the years when I had more time and tried to greet everyone with my welcome letter and the standard letters I had for specific problems, like a lost cat. I used to send them out, and enjoyed it. Sadly, I have had less time for NGs and had to stop that. Of course I also remember the bad times: the worst article I ever read here was a long article praising "our" country and "our" soldiers and the fact that "we" are the best country in the world and went on in this vein. The author was so insensitive on an international NG that she never mentioned the country. Amazing. I was also attacked for giving my standard letters to the NG when I felt I had no longer the time to keep sending them out. I never understood that. I was very sad that when Flippy and I both had web sites with many many stories and the search for a lost cat made the national media in New Zealand they were told all about Flippy's page but not mine. But nothing had quite prepared me for an unjustified attack because of a little story about Nico or Nemo. I shall post no more stories about them: I shall read no more. Of course this NG was also noticeably less friendly and supportive than in the days when every second day there was a story by Dave Yehudah, whom I had the privilege of meeting twice in Los Angeles, and who has many stories on my Storypage. If people want this NG to continue I suggest you should discourage the nasty people, not encourage them, and accept everyone has losses, but they do not justify rudeness. Ok, Gandalf, Yowie, you have seen me off. Good-bye. -- David Stevenson Storypage: http://blakjak.org/sty_menu.htm I'm sorry to hear this, David, especially since I don't do Facebook. I do understand why you were hurt and am very sorry about that. Joy |
#7
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Goodbye
On 1/02/2011 11:35 PM, David Stevenson wrote:
As I expect you remember I posted a humorous little article a month or two ago, and was immediately attacked by Gandalf. Technically, I suppose, the attack was on my wife. One reason given for this unprovoked attack was that Gandalf had suffered a loss. We have all lost cats, or dogs or family members. It is not acceptable to be rude to someone else because we have had a loss. I was very upset. I still feel upset well over a month later at this scurrilous and unprovoked attack. When I indicated how upset I was, a minority of people though Gandalf's attack was acceptable, some because Gandalf had suffered a loss. Acceptable, no, understandable, yes. Yowie said I was mean-spirited to be so upset. No, I didn't, David. Mean spirited has nothing to do with being upset. I well understood that you were upset, and did my best to defend you. However, my comments regarding mean spiritedness was because you had gone and attacked Stormee - and I think you did so because you were upset as I've never, *ever* seen you do that before. These are your words to her: "Clearly you have no idea of cat behaviour. I feel very sorry for you. Fortunately my wife is not so stupid. It is a shame that you think that criticising perfect strangers who you have never met over behaviour you clearly do not understand is what this newsgroup is for." and "Pity you have no understanding of cat5s nor sense of humour.." They seem pretty mean spirited to me. Now, were you upset when you wrote those words? Of course you were. Is it understandable that you were not thinking as rationally as you usually do? Of course! However, does that justify you calling Stormee stupid, saying you feel sorry for her, saying that she has no understanding of cats, and that she has no sense of humour, and that she has no understanding of what RPCA is about? Not in my opinion. The ironic thing is that you have lashed out at someone whilst you were in a state of deep emotional hurt. Just like Gandalf did. It certainly doesn't justify the attack, but perhaps it may make it more understanble and - maybe - forgivable. We are, after all, only human. I did not want to do anything quickly so I have left it for over a month to see how I felt. What do I feel? First, I could never post another anecdote here. I would have no idea whether someone would attack me, perhaps "because they had had a loss". Second, I am almost more shocked at Yowie than the original attack. David, if you have an issue with me I wish you would have addressed me personally about it so we could have worked it out. Can we still do that? Being so upset that I have been in tears having read it does not seem "mean-spirited". I suppose Yowie is merely blaming the victim which seems all the rage these days but I see no reason to blame victims. Alas, David, I suspect the problem here is that - being upset - you are not reading my words in the spirit in which I wrote them. You have taken objection to one small part of what I was saying, taken it in a meaning other than it was intended, and can no longer see anything else that I wrote about you and your wife. I have not and have NEVER meant or implied that 'being upset' is 'mean spirited.' I have set out the reason behind my comment that your attack on Stormee was mean spirited above. I also have also stated previously in this post, and indeed in the original thread, you wrote those words in a state of deep emotional pain. In the original thread, I also noted that for as long as I have known you - which is from just after the Great Split back in 1996 - you have *always* been a model citizen of RPCA, and that should count for something, so your sudden emotional outburst should not be considered in any way typical of your usual demeanor. Third, since I have not felt like reading here since, I expect not reading this NG will not be the end of the world. While I have enjoyed many many articles here, the only loss i really feel from not reading the articles is not reading Mark Edward's articles. I see he is on Facebook: I do hope he will post articles there as much as possible. Can you set your newsreader to killfile everyone but Mark? Of course I shall regret going. I was reading rec.pets.cats before RPCA was ever invented. At least I can re-read the hundreds of articles on my site, plus the hundreds more I have collected but not yet put on my Storypage. They will get there in time. If anyone nice wants to communicate with me I can be found on Facebook. I remember the years when I had more time and tried to greet everyone with my welcome letter and the standard letters I had for specific problems, like a lost cat. I used to send them out, and enjoyed it. Sadly, I have had less time for NGs and had to stop that. Of course I also remember the bad times: the worst article I ever read here was a long article praising "our" country and "our" soldiers and the fact that "we" are the best country in the world and went on in this vein. The author was so insensitive on an international NG that she never mentioned the country. Amazing. I was also attacked for giving my standard letters to the NG when I felt I had no longer the time to keep sending them out. I never understood that. I was very sad that when Flippy and I both had web sites with many many stories and the search for a lost cat made the national media in New Zealand they were told all about Flippy's page but not mine. But nothing had quite prepared me for an unjustified attack because of a little story about Nico or Nemo. I shall post no more stories about them: I shall read no more. Of course this NG was also noticeably less friendly and supportive than in the days when every second day there was a story by Dave Yehudah, whom I had the privilege of meeting twice in Los Angeles, and who has many stories on my Storypage. If people want this NG to continue I suggest you should discourage the nasty people, not encourage them, and accept everyone has losses, but they do not justify rudeness. Ok, Gandalf, Yowie, you have seen me off. Good-bye. I'm sorry you saw it that way, David. It certainly as not my intent. Yowie |
#8
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Goodbye
In ,
NettieCat typed: On Feb 1, 12:35 pm, David Stevenson wrote: As I expect you remember I posted a humorous little article a month or two ago, and was immediately attacked by Gandalf. Technically, I suppose, the attack was on my wife. One reason given for this unprovoked attack was that Gandalf had suffered a loss. We have all lost cats, or dogs or family members. It is not acceptable to be rude to someone else because we have had a loss. I was very upset. I still feel upset well over a month later at this scurrilous and unprovoked attack. When I indicated how upset I was, a minority of people though Gandalf's attack was acceptable, some because Gandalf had suffered a loss. Yowie said I was mean-spirited to be so upset. I did not want to do anything quickly so I have left it for over a month to see how I felt. What do I feel? First, I could never post another anecdote here. I would have no idea whether someone would attack me, perhaps "because they had had a loss". Second, I am almost more shocked at Yowie than the original attack. Being so upset that I have been in tears having read it does not seem "mean-spirited". I suppose Yowie is merely blaming the victim which seems all the rage these days but I see no reason to blame victims. Third, since I have not felt like reading here since, I expect not reading this NG will not be the end of the world. While I have enjoyed many many articles here, the only loss i really feel from not reading the articles is not reading Mark Edward's articles. I see he is on Facebook: I do hope he will post articles there as much as possible. Of course I shall regret going. I was reading rec.pets.cats before RPCA was ever invented. At least I can re-read the hundreds of articles on my site, plus the hundreds more I have collected but not yet put on my Storypage. They will get there in time. If anyone nice wants to communicate with me I can be found on Facebook. I remember the years when I had more time and tried to greet everyone with my welcome letter and the standard letters I had for specific problems, like a lost cat. I used to send them out, and enjoyed it. Sadly, I have had less time for NGs and had to stop that. Of course I also remember the bad times: the worst article I ever read here was a long article praising "our" country and "our" soldiers and the fact that "we" are the best country in the world and went on in this vein. The author was so insensitive on an international NG that she never mentioned the country. Amazing. I was also attacked for giving my standard letters to the NG when I felt I had no longer the time to keep sending them out. I never understood that. I was very sad that when Flippy and I both had web sites with many many stories and the search for a lost cat made the national media in New Zealand they were told all about Flippy's page but not mine. But nothing had quite prepared me for an unjustified attack because of a little story about Nico or Nemo. I shall post no more stories about them: I shall read no more. Of course this NG was also noticeably less friendly and supportive than in the days when every second day there was a story by Dave Yehudah, whom I had the privilege of meeting twice in Los Angeles, and who has many stories on my Storypage. If people want this NG to continue I suggest you should discourage the nasty people, not encourage them, and accept everyone has losses, but they do not justify rudeness. Ok, Gandalf, Yowie, you have seen me off. Good-bye. -- David Stevenson Storypage:http://blakjak.org/sty_menu.htm Liverpool, England, UK Emails welcome Nico: SI Vp B 0.6 Y++ L-- W C+++ I+++ T+ A+ E++ H S+ V+ F- Q P+ B+ PA PL- SC+ Nemo: SI Vp B 0.6 Y++ L-- W C+++ I+++ T A+ E++ H S+ V+ F- Q P B+ PA PL- SC+ I'm sorry that you've made this decision David, I can understand why things have piled up and left you feeling unappreciated, after all that you've done for everyone here. I just wish that you could see that there still is some good here. I also think that you misread Yowie's comments, she would never hurt you deliberately, but that's between the two of you. Thanks for saying that, Jeanette -and you are right. I never intended to hurt David (i thought I was defending him!) and feel that I've been very much taken out of context on this one. Yowie |
#9
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Goodbye
Yowie wrote:
In , NettieCat typed: On Feb 1, 12:35 pm, David Stevenson wrote: As I expect you remember I posted a humorous little article a month or two ago, and was immediately attacked by Gandalf. Technically, I suppose, the attack was on my wife. One reason given for this unprovoked attack was that Gandalf had suffered a loss. We have all lost cats, or dogs or family members. It is not acceptable to be rude to someone else because we have had a loss. I was very upset. I still feel upset well over a month later at this scurrilous and unprovoked attack. When I indicated how upset I was, a minority of people though Gandalf's attack was acceptable, some because Gandalf had suffered a loss. Yowie said I was mean-spirited to be so upset. I did not want to do anything quickly so I have left it for over a month to see how I felt. What do I feel? First, I could never post another anecdote here. I would have no idea whether someone would attack me, perhaps "because they had had a loss". Second, I am almost more shocked at Yowie than the original attack. Being so upset that I have been in tears having read it does not seem "mean-spirited". I suppose Yowie is merely blaming the victim which seems all the rage these days but I see no reason to blame victims. Third, since I have not felt like reading here since, I expect not reading this NG will not be the end of the world. While I have enjoyed many many articles here, the only loss i really feel from not reading the articles is not reading Mark Edward's articles. I see he is on Facebook: I do hope he will post articles there as much as possible. Of course I shall regret going. I was reading rec.pets.cats before RPCA was ever invented. At least I can re-read the hundreds of articles on my site, plus the hundreds more I have collected but not yet put on my Storypage. They will get there in time. If anyone nice wants to communicate with me I can be found on Facebook. I remember the years when I had more time and tried to greet everyone with my welcome letter and the standard letters I had for specific problems, like a lost cat. I used to send them out, and enjoyed it. Sadly, I have had less time for NGs and had to stop that. Of course I also remember the bad times: the worst article I ever read here was a long article praising "our" country and "our" soldiers and the fact that "we" are the best country in the world and went on in this vein. The author was so insensitive on an international NG that she never mentioned the country. Amazing. I was also attacked for giving my standard letters to the NG when I felt I had no longer the time to keep sending them out. I never understood that. I was very sad that when Flippy and I both had web sites with many many stories and the search for a lost cat made the national media in New Zealand they were told all about Flippy's page but not mine. But nothing had quite prepared me for an unjustified attack because of a little story about Nico or Nemo. I shall post no more stories about them: I shall read no more. Of course this NG was also noticeably less friendly and supportive than in the days when every second day there was a story by Dave Yehudah, whom I had the privilege of meeting twice in Los Angeles, and who has many stories on my Storypage. If people want this NG to continue I suggest you should discourage the nasty people, not encourage them, and accept everyone has losses, but they do not justify rudeness. Ok, Gandalf, Yowie, you have seen me off. Good-bye. -- David Stevenson Storypage:http://blakjak.org/sty_menu.htm Liverpool, England, UK Emails welcome Nico: SI Vp B 0.6 Y++ L-- W C+++ I+++ T+ A+ E++ H S+ V+ F- Q P+ B+ PA PL- SC+ Nemo: SI Vp B 0.6 Y++ L-- W C+++ I+++ T A+ E++ H S+ V+ F- Q P B+ PA PL- SC+ I'm sorry that you've made this decision David, I can understand why things have piled up and left you feeling unappreciated, after all that you've done for everyone here. I just wish that you could see that there still is some good here. I also think that you misread Yowie's comments, she would never hurt you deliberately, but that's between the two of you. Thanks for saying that, Jeanette -and you are right. I never intended to hurt David (i thought I was defending him!) and feel that I've been very much taken out of context on this one. It's interesting. I've seen a number of people "take their leave" in a similar manner, and once they've decided they're not wanted somewhere, their minds are made up and nothing anyone does or says seems capable of changing that. Whereas if I were feeling like David is feeling, your comment above (along with the comments of several others, asking David to stay) would change my mind in an INSTANT. Usually when I feel hurt and rejected, all it would take is a few people to say, "No, we love you Joyce, please don't go!" and I'd be *over it*. This is not to say that I wouldn't feel the same way again sometime in the future, for some other reason, but that particular episode would be over for me. We all have our upset, cranky and irrational moments, and I'm certainly no exception. On the other hand, I don't think I'm any *more* cranky or irrational than anyone else. I guess the bottom line is, no matter how nice a person is, "nice" doesn't really buy much. That's not what makes people care about each other, in the end. David Yehudah wasn't popular here because he was *nice*. He was popular because he was funny, and entertaining - a spinner of wild tales with a unique take on life. I'm confident that David Stevenson is liked in a simliar manner, so he's allowed an occasional outburst. Joyce -- Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me, either. Just leave me the hell alone. -- Unknown |
#10
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Goodbye
wrote in message
... Yowie wrote: In , NettieCat typed: On Feb 1, 12:35 pm, David Stevenson wrote: As I expect you remember I posted a humorous little article a month or two ago, and was immediately attacked by Gandalf. Technically, I suppose, the attack was on my wife. One reason given for this unprovoked attack was that Gandalf had suffered a loss. We have all lost cats, or dogs or family members. It is not acceptable to be rude to someone else because we have had a loss. I was very upset. I still feel upset well over a month later at this scurrilous and unprovoked attack. When I indicated how upset I was, a minority of people though Gandalf's attack was acceptable, some because Gandalf had suffered a loss. Yowie said I was mean-spirited to be so upset. I did not want to do anything quickly so I have left it for over a month to see how I felt. What do I feel? First, I could never post another anecdote here. I would have no idea whether someone would attack me, perhaps "because they had had a loss". Second, I am almost more shocked at Yowie than the original attack. Being so upset that I have been in tears having read it does not seem "mean-spirited". I suppose Yowie is merely blaming the victim which seems all the rage these days but I see no reason to blame victims. Third, since I have not felt like reading here since, I expect not reading this NG will not be the end of the world. While I have enjoyed many many articles here, the only loss i really feel from not reading the articles is not reading Mark Edward's articles. I see he is on Facebook: I do hope he will post articles there as much as possible. Of course I shall regret going. I was reading rec.pets.cats before RPCA was ever invented. At least I can re-read the hundreds of articles on my site, plus the hundreds more I have collected but not yet put on my Storypage. They will get there in time. If anyone nice wants to communicate with me I can be found on Facebook. I remember the years when I had more time and tried to greet everyone with my welcome letter and the standard letters I had for specific problems, like a lost cat. I used to send them out, and enjoyed it. Sadly, I have had less time for NGs and had to stop that. Of course I also remember the bad times: the worst article I ever read here was a long article praising "our" country and "our" soldiers and the fact that "we" are the best country in the world and went on in this vein. The author was so insensitive on an international NG that she never mentioned the country. Amazing. I was also attacked for giving my standard letters to the NG when I felt I had no longer the time to keep sending them out. I never understood that. I was very sad that when Flippy and I both had web sites with many many stories and the search for a lost cat made the national media in New Zealand they were told all about Flippy's page but not mine. But nothing had quite prepared me for an unjustified attack because of a little story about Nico or Nemo. I shall post no more stories about them: I shall read no more. Of course this NG was also noticeably less friendly and supportive than in the days when every second day there was a story by Dave Yehudah, whom I had the privilege of meeting twice in Los Angeles, and who has many stories on my Storypage. If people want this NG to continue I suggest you should discourage the nasty people, not encourage them, and accept everyone has losses, but they do not justify rudeness. Ok, Gandalf, Yowie, you have seen me off. Good-bye. -- David Stevenson Storypage:http://blakjak.org/sty_menu.htm Liverpool, England, UK Emails welcome Nico: SI Vp B 0.6 Y++ L-- W C+++ I+++ T+ A+ E++ H S+ V+ F- Q P+ B+ PA PL- SC+ Nemo: SI Vp B 0.6 Y++ L-- W C+++ I+++ T A+ E++ H S+ V+ F- Q P B+ PA PL- SC+ I'm sorry that you've made this decision David, I can understand why things have piled up and left you feeling unappreciated, after all that you've done for everyone here. I just wish that you could see that there still is some good here. I also think that you misread Yowie's comments, she would never hurt you deliberately, but that's between the two of you. Thanks for saying that, Jeanette -and you are right. I never intended to hurt David (i thought I was defending him!) and feel that I've been very much taken out of context on this one. It's interesting. I've seen a number of people "take their leave" in a similar manner, and once they've decided they're not wanted somewhere, their minds are made up and nothing anyone does or says seems capable of changing that. Whereas if I were feeling like David is feeling, your comment above (along with the comments of several others, asking David to stay) would change my mind in an INSTANT. Usually when I feel hurt and rejected, all it would take is a few people to say, "No, we love you Joyce, please don't go!" and I'd be *over it*. This is not to say that I wouldn't feel the same way again sometime in the future, for some other reason, but that particular episode would be over for me. We all have our upset, cranky and irrational moments, and I'm certainly no exception. On the other hand, I don't think I'm any *more* cranky or irrational than anyone else. I guess the bottom line is, no matter how nice a person is, "nice" doesn't really buy much. That's not what makes people care about each other, in the end. David Yehudah wasn't popular here because he was *nice*. He was popular because he was funny, and entertaining - a spinner of wild tales with a unique take on life. I'm confident that David Stevenson is liked in a simliar manner, so he's allowed an occasional outburst. Joyce I'm sorry, but I have to disagree with you. I happen to like people who are nice, and the fact that they are nice is probably the main reason I like them. If they are entertaining, that's a plus. Joy |
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