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OT This one is for you catnipped You Might Be From Texas if.........



 
 
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  #1  
Old March 21st 06, 12:50 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
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Default OT This one is for you catnipped You Might Be From Texas if.........


This one is for you catnipped and you other texans


U R A Texan If:

1. You can properly pronounce Corsicana, Palestine, Decatur, Wichita Falls,
San Antonio, Burnet, Boerne, Nacogdoches, Mexia, Waco, Amarillo, and
Waxahachie.

2. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for
a funnel.

3. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.

4. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the
distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.

5. Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.

6. You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.

7. You measure distance in minutes.

8. Little Smokies are something you serve only for special occasions.

9. You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.

10. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.

11. You know cowpies are not made of beef.

12. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding
date.

13. You have known someone who has had a belt buckle bigger than your fist.

14. You aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in
the same store.

15. Your "place at the lake" has wheels under it.

16. A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol; a Ford F350 4x4 is.

17. You know everything goes better with Ranch dressin'.

18. You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned how to multiply.

19. You actually understand this and you are "fixin' to" send it to your
friends.

20. Finally, you are 100% Texan if you have ever heard this conversation:
"You wanna coke?"
"Yeah."
"What kind?"
"Dr. Pepper!"


  #2  
Old March 21st 06, 01:24 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
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Default OT This one is for you catnipped You Might Be From Texas if.........

"Matthew AKA NMR ( NO MORE RETAIL )" 10 points a troll
@linethetrollsup.com wrote in message
...

This one is for you catnipped and you other texans


U R A Texan If:

1. You can properly pronounce Corsicana, Palestine, Decatur, Wichita
Falls, San Antonio, Burnet, Boerne, Nacogdoches, Mexia, Waco, Amarillo,
and Waxahachie.

2. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look
for a funnel.

3. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.


LOL! We've had to switch from heat to A/C, back to heat, and then back to
A/C in a 24 hour time span. Just a couple of weeks ago temps went from 85
in the afternoon down to 31 that night, then back up to 80 a day later!


4. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by
the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.


Very, *VERY* true!


5. Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.

6. You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.

7. You measure distance in minutes.

8. Little Smokies are something you serve only for special occasions.

9. You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.

10. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.

11. You know cowpies are not made of beef.

12. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding
date.

13. You have known someone who has had a belt buckle bigger than your
fist.

14. You aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in
the same store.

15. Your "place at the lake" has wheels under it.

16. A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol; a Ford F350 4x4 is.

17. You know everything goes better with Ranch dressin'.

18. You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned how to multiply.

19. You actually understand this and you are "fixin' to" send it to your
friends.


I'm fixin' to do that right now! ;


--

Hugs,

CatNipped

See all my masters at: http://www.PossiblePlaces.com/CatNipped/




20. Finally, you are 100% Texan if you have ever heard this conversation:
"You wanna coke?"
"Yeah."
"What kind?"
"Dr. Pepper!"



  #3  
Old March 21st 06, 01:24 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
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Default OT This one is for you catnipped You Might Be From Texas if.........

On Mon 20 Mar 2006 06:50:54p, Matthew AKA NMR ( NO MORE RETAIL )
wrote in rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
m):


This one is for you catnipped and you other texans


U R A Texan If:


Those are great!

Now time to poke fun at my home state of "Merlin"

The Merlin (Maryland) Dialect is spoken by a mixed population
which inhabits a triangular area on the western littoral of the
Chesapeake Bay, bounded roughly by a line commencing at Towson's
Toyota, then westward to the Frederick Mall, thence following the
western border of the cable TV franchise and the string of
McDonalds' along Route 50 to the Bay.

All of these lands and the natives thereof are known as the Land
of Merlin.

They divide it further into semi-tribal areas called Cannies
"COUNTIES" (e.g.,Ballmer Canny, PeeJee Canny, Hard Canny, etc.).
The dialect area is centered on a market center called Glimburny,
where the people come on weekends to trade their goods.

Because of the numerous words and phrases common to both Merlin
Dialect and modern English, linguists have long postulated that
there is some kinship between the two. Speakers of Merlin Dialect
are all able to understand standard English from babyhood, chiefly
because of their voracious appetite for television. However, they
invariably refuse to speak standard English, even with outsiders
who obviously are not understanding a word they say.

LESSON 1 - VOCABULARY

Ballmer - Our city

Merlin - Our State

Arn - What you do to wrinkled clothes

Bulled Egg - An egg cooked in water

Jeet - How we say "Did you eat"?

Chest Peak - A large nearby body of water

Colleyflare - A white vegetable

Downey Owe Shin - Summertime destination "Down to the ocean" (such
as Ayshun City)

Droodle Pork - Druid Hill Park

Faren Gins - Red trucks that put out fires

Hi Hon - How we always say "hello"

Holluntown - Highland Town

Meedjum - The grassy area between lanes of a highway

Nap Lis - State of Merlin capital

Ole Bay - What our crabs taste like

Oreos - Not a cookie, but our baseball team

Payment - That strip of cement that you walk on

PohLeese - Those guys in uniform that git ya when you're speeding

Share - Hot water that cleans you in the morning

Flares - Such as tulips

Tarred - What happens when you work too hard

Warsh - What we do with dirty clothes

Warter - What we drink (can also be Wooter)

Winders - Those glass things that we look out of Paramore Power
mower

Brawl - Broil

Sem elem - Seven Eleven

Allanic - an ocean

Arnjuice - from the sunshine tree

Arouwn in all directions - norf, souf, ees, and wess

Aspern - what you take for headaches

Bald - some people like their eggs this way

Bawler - what the plumber calls your furnace

Beeno - a famous railroad

Calf Lick - bleevers are Protestant, Jewish, and .

Canny - a state gubmit division, such as Anne Arundel or Prince
George's

--
Cheryl
  #4  
Old March 21st 06, 01:44 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
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Posts: n/a
Default OT This one is for you catnipped You Might Be From Texas if.........

I've been gone for forty years, and lived in Rockville, so never had the
full benefit of the Merlin accent. But after reading this I'd kill for a
Crab Cake and will be talking funny for a week.

Jo

"Cheryl" wrote in message
...
On Mon 20 Mar 2006 06:50:54p, Matthew AKA NMR ( NO MORE RETAIL )
wrote in rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
m):


This one is for you catnipped and you other texans


U R A Texan If:


Those are great!

Now time to poke fun at my home state of "Merlin"

The Merlin (Maryland) Dialect is spoken by a mixed population
which inhabits a triangular area on the western littoral of the
Chesapeake Bay, bounded roughly by a line commencing at Towson's
Toyota, then westward to the Frederick Mall, thence following the
western border of the cable TV franchise and the string of
McDonalds' along Route 50 to the Bay.

All of these lands and the natives thereof are known as the Land
of Merlin.

They divide it further into semi-tribal areas called Cannies
"COUNTIES" (e.g.,Ballmer Canny, PeeJee Canny, Hard Canny, etc.).
The dialect area is centered on a market center called Glimburny,
where the people come on weekends to trade their goods.

Because of the numerous words and phrases common to both Merlin
Dialect and modern English, linguists have long postulated that
there is some kinship between the two. Speakers of Merlin Dialect
are all able to understand standard English from babyhood, chiefly
because of their voracious appetite for television. However, they
invariably refuse to speak standard English, even with outsiders
who obviously are not understanding a word they say.

LESSON 1 - VOCABULARY

Ballmer - Our city

Merlin - Our State

Arn - What you do to wrinkled clothes

Bulled Egg - An egg cooked in water

Jeet - How we say "Did you eat"?

Chest Peak - A large nearby body of water

Colleyflare - A white vegetable

Downey Owe Shin - Summertime destination "Down to the ocean" (such
as Ayshun City)

Droodle Pork - Druid Hill Park

Faren Gins - Red trucks that put out fires

Hi Hon - How we always say "hello"

Holluntown - Highland Town

Meedjum - The grassy area between lanes of a highway

Nap Lis - State of Merlin capital

Ole Bay - What our crabs taste like

Oreos - Not a cookie, but our baseball team

Payment - That strip of cement that you walk on

PohLeese - Those guys in uniform that git ya when you're speeding

Share - Hot water that cleans you in the morning

Flares - Such as tulips

Tarred - What happens when you work too hard

Warsh - What we do with dirty clothes

Warter - What we drink (can also be Wooter)

Winders - Those glass things that we look out of Paramore Power
mower

Brawl - Broil

Sem elem - Seven Eleven

Allanic - an ocean

Arnjuice - from the sunshine tree

Arouwn in all directions - norf, souf, ees, and wess

Aspern - what you take for headaches

Bald - some people like their eggs this way

Bawler - what the plumber calls your furnace

Beeno - a famous railroad

Calf Lick - bleevers are Protestant, Jewish, and .

Canny - a state gubmit division, such as Anne Arundel or Prince
George's

--
Cheryl



  #5  
Old March 21st 06, 02:12 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
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Posts: n/a
Default OT This one is for you catnipped You Might Be From Texas if.........

On Mon 20 Mar 2006 07:44:56p, Jo Firey wrote in
rec.pets.cats.anecdotes ):

I've been gone for forty years, and lived in Rockville, so never
had the full benefit of the Merlin accent. But after reading
this I'd kill for a Crab Cake and will be talking funny for a
week.


Yeah, I don't have that dialect, either, but plenty of people I know
talk like that. I live closer to Annapolis, and I work in Rockville.
All of the jokes about the DC area and the commute apply to me!

--
Cheryl
  #6  
Old March 21st 06, 02:15 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
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Posts: n/a
Default Since I poked fun at texas it is my turn about Kentucky and Florida...

Kentucky Jokes

Kentucky: Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names


STATE OF KENTUCKY RESIDENCY APPLICATION
Name: ________________ (_) Billy-Bob
(last) (_) Billy-Joe
(_) Billy-Ray
(_) Billy-Sue
(_) Billy-Mae
(_) Billy-Jack
(Check appropriate box)

Age: ____
Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ N/A
Shoe Size ____ Left ____ Right


Occupation:
(_) Farmer
(_) Mechanic
(_) Hair Dresser
(_) Un-employed


Spouse's Name: __________________________

Relationship with spouse:
(_) Sister
(_) Brother
(_) Aunt
(_) Uncle
(_) Cousin
(_) Mother
(_) Father
(_) Son
(_) Daughter
(_) Pet


Number of children living in household: ___

Number that are yours: ___

Mother's Name: _______________________

Father's Name: _______________________ (If not sure, leave blank)


Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)

Do you (_)own or (_)rent your mobile home? (Check appropriate box)

__ Total number of vehicles you own
__ Number of vehicles that still crank
__ Number of vehicles in front yard
__ Number of vehicles in back yard
__ Number of vehicles on cement blocks


Firearms you own and where you keep them:
____ truck
____ bedroom
____ bathroom
____ kitchen
____ shed


Model and year of your pickup: _____________ 194_


Do you have a gun rack?
(_) Yes (_) No; please explain:


Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:
(_) The National Enquirer
(_) The Globe
(_) TV Guide
(_) Soap Opera Digest
(_) Rifle and Shotgun


___ Number of times you've seen a UFO

___ Number of times you've seen Elvis

___ Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO


How often do you bathe:
(_)Weekly
(_)Monthly
(_)Not Applicable


Color of teeth:
(_)Yellow
(_)Brownish-Yellow
(_)Brown
(_)Black
(_)N/A


Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:
(_)Red-Man


How far is your home from a paved road?
(_)1 mile
(_)2 miles
(_)don't know




Dumb Kentucky Laws
Any person who appears on any highway, or upon the street of any city that
has no police protection, when clothed only in ordinary bathing garb, shall
be fined no less than five dollars nor more than twenty-five dollars." - KRS
436.140 (Passed in 1922; Repealed in 1974)


No person shall sell, exchange, offer to sell or exchange, display or
possess living baby chicks, ducklings, or other fowl or rabbits which have
been dyed or colored; nor dye or color any baby chicks, ducklings or other
fowl or rabbits; nor sell, exchange, offer to sell or exchange or to give
away baby chicks, ducklings or other fowl or rabbits, under two months of
age in any quantity less than six, except that any rabbit weighing three
pounds or more may be sold at an age of six weeks. Any person who violates
this section shall be fined not less than $100 nor more than $500. -KRS
436.600 (Passed 1966 Ky. Acts ch. 215, sec. 5.)


No person owning or controlling a billiard or pool table shall permit, for
compensation or reward, any minor under eighteen (18) years of age to play
any game on the table, unless such minor shall have first displayed an
identification card containing his name, age, photograph, and the signature
of his parents or guardian. The minor shall keep such identification card on
his person, and it shall be subject to inspection at any time by any peace
officer. The person owning or controlling such billiard or pool table shall
keep and maintain a registration book in which each minor shall sign. The
person owning or controlling such billiard or pool table shall supply a
blank identification card to each parent or guardian who makes request for
same. Any person who violates this section shall be fined not less than ten
($10) nor more than one hundred dollars ($100) for each offense. -KRS
436.320 (Passed 1893; Amended in 1954, Ky. Acts ch. 232, sec. 1)


Any person who displays, handles or uses any kind of reptile in connection
withany religious service or gathering shall be fined not less than fifty
dollars ($50) nor more than one hundred dollars ($100). -KRS 437.060 (Passed
1942, from Ky. Stat. sec. 1267a-1.).


It is illegal to fish with a bow and arrow in Kentucky.


It's illegal to fish in the Ohio River in Kentucky without an Indiana
Fishing License.


All bees entering Kentucky shall be accompanied by certificates of health,
stating that the apiary from which the bees came was free from contagious or
infectious disease. -KRS 252.130 (Passed in 1922; Repealed in 1948)


Lexington

It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.


By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold
onto the ground."


Owensboro
A woman may not buy a hat without her husband's permission.


Why don't they teach sex education to hillbillies?
The farm animals can't handle it.

Did you hear about the Kentucky Wildcat who passed away and left his entire
estate in trust for his beloved widow? She can't touch it till she's
fourteen.

What's the difference between a good ol' boy and a Kentoucky Wildcat
graduate?
The good ol' boy raises livestock. The Kentucky graduate gets emotionally
involved.

What do you call a virgin in Kentucky?
A girl who can out run her Brothers

Q: Why didn't the Kentucky man want his son to marry a virgin?
A: Because if she isn't good enough for her brothers, she isn't good enough
for
our family.

Q: Why do folks in Eastern Kentucky go to the movie theater in groups of 18
or
more?
A: 'Cuz 17 and under are not admitted.














Florida Jokes
Florida: Ask Us About Our Grandkids

Dumb Florida Laws
Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon
owner.
A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she
shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be
paid just as it would for a vehicle.
It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays.
It is considered an offense to shower naked.
You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the
edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
You may not kiss your wife's breasts.
Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.
It is illegal to block any traveled wagon road.
Big Pine Key
It is illegal to molest a Key deer. If caught one will be fined or will have
to go to jail.
Cape Coral
It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a
clothesline.
It it illegal to park a pick-up truck in your driveway or in front of your
house on the street. This law is limited to only those who do not own the
house. (Repealed 2000)
Daytona Beach
The molestation of trash cans is banned.
Sec. 10-56. While intoxicated, under influence of narcotics, prohibited. It
shall be unlawful for any person to swim or bathe in that portion of the
Atlantic Ocean within the corporate limits of the city when under the
influence of intoxicating liquor or narcotic drugs to the extent that his or
her normal faculties are impaired. (Code 1955, ? 28-64)
Sec. 22-44. Storage, depositing prohibited. It shall be unlawful for any
person, either as owner, occupant, lessee, agent, tenant, or otherwise, to
store or deposit, or cause or permit to be stored or deposited, any
abandoned, junked or discarded motor vehicle or motor vehicles upon any
public or private property within the city. (Code 1955, ? 20-11)
Sec. 18-2. Weeds, trash, etc., as a public nuisance; removal by property
owner or by city at owner's expense; notice and hearing; lien for expenses.
(a) The existence of weeds, trash, undergrowth, brush, filth, garbage or
other refuse on any lot, tract or parcel of land within the city which has
caused the property to become, or which may reasonably cause the property to
become infested, or inhabited by rodents, vermin or wild animals, or may
furnish a breeding place for mosquitoes or threatens the public health,
safety or welfare, or may reasonably cause disease or adversely affects and
impairs the economic welfare of the adjacent property, is declared to
constitute a public nuisance and is hereby prohibited.
Hialeah
Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.
Jupiter Inlet Colony Inlet
Sec. 3-1. Bird sanctuary declared. (a) It is hereby declared that all
territory embraced within the corporate limits of the municipality shall be
a bird sanctuary. (b) It shall be unlawful for any person within the
municipality to shoot, trap or in any manner kill, wound or maim any bird of
any kind, or at any time to throw at any birds of any kind any missile with
slingshots or any other weapon, or to disturb their eggs or their young or
their nests. (Ord. No. 8-59, ?? 1, 2, 8-10-59)
Key West
Chickens are considered a 'protected species'.
Miami
It is illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
Sec. 8-3. Bell or other warning device. No person shall operate a bicycle
unless it is equipped with a bell or device capable of giving a signal
audible for a distance of at least 100 feet, but no bicycle shall be
equipped with, nor shall any person use upon a bicycle, any siren or
whistle. (Code 1967, ? 8-3; Code 1980, ? 8-3)
Pensacola
Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their
person.
It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the
contents of the barrel.
A women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a
bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.
Pinecrest
In order to operate a burglar alarm, a permit must be obtained. Sec. 12-23.
Registration required; application; transferability; false statements.
(a)All persons must complete and submit to the village an emergency contact
registration form for their alarm if they operate or cause to be operated an
alarm system in the village. A separate registration is required for each
alarm system. Upon receipt of a completed registration form, the police
department shall issue a numbered alarm sticker to the applicant to
facilitate retrieval of registration information. (Ord. No. 97-17, ? 1,
10-14-97)
Sanford
Stage nudity is banned, with the exception of "bona fide" theatrical
performances. Violating this ordinance results in a $100 fine.
Sarasota
If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.00.
You may not catch crabs.
Tampa Bay
It is illegal to eat cottage cheese on Sunday after 6:00 P.M.


Florida State Mottos
FLORIDA: If you think we can't vote, wait till you see us drive.

FLORIDA: We count more than you do.

FLORIDA: If you don't like the way we count then take I-95 and visit one of
the other 56 states.

FLORIDA: We've been Gored by the bull of politics and we're Bushed.

FLORIDA: Relax...Retire...ReVote.

FLORIDA: What comes after 17,311?

FLORIDA: Where your vote counts...and counts...and counts...

FLORIDA: We don't just cheat in football.

FLORIDA: We're number one! Wait! Recount!

Palm Beach County: So nice, we let you vote twice.

Palm Beach County: We put the "duh" in Florida.

FLORIDA: Home of electile dysfunction.

FLORIDA: We count more than you do.

FLORIDA: This is what you get for taking Elian away from us.

FLORIDA: This isn't good when Alabama counts faster than us!

FLORIDA: Once is never enough!

FLORIDA: We would do a recount but we've run out of fingers and toes!

FLORIDA: Don't blame me, I voted for Gore, I think.

FLORIDA: Don't blame me, my vote didn't count.

FLORIDA: We're retired --no wait-- we're retarded!

FLORIDA: Don't count on us!

FLORIDA: Home of the edible chad.

FLORIDA: Bumbling better than ever!


Defining terms
C - Can
H - Help
A - All
D - Democrats


  #7  
Old March 21st 06, 02:56 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default OT This one is for you catnipped You Might Be From Texas if.........

On Mon, 20 Mar 2006 23:50:54 GMT, "Matthew AKA NMR \( NO MORE RETAIL
\)" 10 points a troll @linethetrollsup.com wrote:

This one is for you catnipped and you other texans


U R A Texan If:


And I thought there were only two ways to tell if you were a Texan:
you were born there or you had shed blood on Texas soil. I did the
latter while I was living in Corpus Christi.

--
T.E.D. )
  #8  
Old March 21st 06, 03:01 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default OT This one is for you catnipped You Might Be From Texas if.........

"Ted Davis" wrote in message
...
On Mon, 20 Mar 2006 23:50:54 GMT, "Matthew AKA NMR \( NO MORE RETAIL
\)" 10 points a troll @linethetrollsup.com wrote:

This one is for you catnipped and you other texans


U R A Texan If:


And I thought there were only two ways to tell if you were a Texan:
you were born there or you had shed blood on Texas soil. I did the
latter while I was living in Corpus Christi.


Klutz that I am, I've shed blood here since I moved. There are bumper
stickers that voice my sentiments that read, "I wasn't born in Texas, but I
got here as fast as I could."

--

Hugs,

CatNipped

See all my masters at: http://www.PossiblePlaces.com/CatNipped/




--
T.E.D. )



  #9  
Old March 21st 06, 06:27 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default OT This one is for you catnipped You Might Be From Texas if.........

On 2006-03-21, CatNipped penned:
Klutz that I am, I've shed blood here since I moved. There are
bumper stickers that voice my sentiments that read, "I wasn't born
in Texas, but I got here as fast as I could."


I've seen the same sticker, except with Boulder as the place. It made
particular sense to me, because a lot of native Boulderites have
stickers on their cars proclaiming "Boulder Native" or similar.

Come to think of it, the same is probably true in Texas.

--
monique, who spoils Oscar unmercifully

pictures: http://www.bounceswoosh.org/rpca
  #10  
Old March 21st 06, 06:50 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default OT This one is for you catnipped You Might Be From Texas if.........

BWAHAHAHAHA! Thanks, Cheryl! Forwarded on to many... giggle

Cappy
Edgewater, Merlin, in Annrunnel Canny

"Cheryl" wrote in message
...
On Mon 20 Mar 2006 06:50:54p, Matthew AKA NMR ( NO MORE RETAIL )
wrote in rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
m):


This one is for you catnipped and you other texans


U R A Texan If:


Those are great!

Now time to poke fun at my home state of "Merlin"

The Merlin (Maryland) Dialect is spoken by a mixed population
which inhabits a triangular area on the western littoral of the
Chesapeake Bay, bounded roughly by a line commencing at Towson's
Toyota, then westward to the Frederick Mall, thence following the
western border of the cable TV franchise and the string of
McDonalds' along Route 50 to the Bay.

All of these lands and the natives thereof are known as the Land
of Merlin.

They divide it further into semi-tribal areas called Cannies
"COUNTIES" (e.g.,Ballmer Canny, PeeJee Canny, Hard Canny, etc.).
The dialect area is centered on a market center called Glimburny,
where the people come on weekends to trade their goods.

Because of the numerous words and phrases common to both Merlin
Dialect and modern English, linguists have long postulated that
there is some kinship between the two. Speakers of Merlin Dialect
are all able to understand standard English from babyhood, chiefly
because of their voracious appetite for television. However, they
invariably refuse to speak standard English, even with outsiders
who obviously are not understanding a word they say.

LESSON 1 - VOCABULARY

Ballmer - Our city

Merlin - Our State

Arn - What you do to wrinkled clothes

Bulled Egg - An egg cooked in water

Jeet - How we say "Did you eat"?

Chest Peak - A large nearby body of water

Colleyflare - A white vegetable

Downey Owe Shin - Summertime destination "Down to the ocean" (such
as Ayshun City)

Droodle Pork - Druid Hill Park

Faren Gins - Red trucks that put out fires

Hi Hon - How we always say "hello"

Holluntown - Highland Town

Meedjum - The grassy area between lanes of a highway

Nap Lis - State of Merlin capital

Ole Bay - What our crabs taste like

Oreos - Not a cookie, but our baseball team

Payment - That strip of cement that you walk on

PohLeese - Those guys in uniform that git ya when you're speeding

Share - Hot water that cleans you in the morning

Flares - Such as tulips

Tarred - What happens when you work too hard

Warsh - What we do with dirty clothes

Warter - What we drink (can also be Wooter)

Winders - Those glass things that we look out of Paramore Power
mower

Brawl - Broil

Sem elem - Seven Eleven

Allanic - an ocean

Arnjuice - from the sunshine tree

Arouwn in all directions - norf, souf, ees, and wess

Aspern - what you take for headaches

Bald - some people like their eggs this way

Bawler - what the plumber calls your furnace

Beeno - a famous railroad

Calf Lick - bleevers are Protestant, Jewish, and .

Canny - a state gubmit division, such as Anne Arundel or Prince
George's

--
Cheryl



 




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