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The Cats and the Mats
(apologies to Dr. Seuess...)
Four of the Magnificent Seven had developed nasty mats on their rear quarters. Three of them (Fearless. Smokey and Cinder) are, I think, just getting too old and stiff to groom properly, and with all the remodeling, we'd fallen down on the job of brushing our masters properly. Miss Kitty is just too darned fat to reach herself, age has nothing to do with it. We've never really had a problem of mats before this...whether because all we had were mostly DSH, or because they all groomed anyway until the went to the RB, I don't know. But a slicker brush has always sufficed to make them smooth and pretty...so far. Last week, I hit the local Petco and found 4 (four!!) kinds of de- matting tools to try. A "rake"; a thing that looks like a curry comb, which doesn't look like it ought to do anything, but it really does; a smaller andall one direction version of a rake; and this thing that looks like a women's disposable razor but isn't. (Does have sharp edges though...). We also have a pair of "bandage scissors" that we use for the worst ones. By today, Cinder's mats are all clear, and she is LOVING the curry comb treatment. Smokey's mats are all clear, and she too is loving the curry comb thing. Miss Kitty only has 3 mats left but she's gotten so distressed with me that she wo't let me near, even when I don't have anything in my hand. She hops down from where she is and stalks off when I even get near. Despite the kitty treats! (I figured food would certainly get her attention, but noooooooo....) Fearless has 2 good sized mats left, and one is much reduced because I've been picking on it by hand when he les down in the crook of my arm. He gets disgusted after a couple of minutes (at most) and gets up and talks off in a huff. Then he comes right back and lays down. I dunno about that cat.... I'm amazed at the amount of fur coming off these animals! There's plenty ot make a coat with, I'll bet... Debora Only got scracthed once. |
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The Cats and the Mats
wrote in message ... (apologies to Dr. Seuess...) Four of the Magnificent Seven had developed nasty mats on their rear quarters. Three of them (Fearless. Smokey and Cinder) are, I think, just getting too old and stiff to groom properly, and with all the remodeling, we'd fallen down on the job of brushing our masters properly. Miss Kitty is just too darned fat to reach herself, age has nothing to do with it. Fat cats sat mats Cats on mats Mats on cats Take those mats off the cats Fat cats mats sat no mats on cats cats still on mats Take those smiles off the cats Mad cats with mad mats mad mats with big hats mad cats mad at Debora mad mats mad at Debora Debora made mad mats go mad cats made Debora slow see Debora picking on mats see Debora picking up cats Fat cats sat mats poor Debora picking at mats ********** Pam S. wondering how Seuss did it for all those years |
#3
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The Cats and the Mats
I have two DLH cats who are having matting problems now that they are older. The slicker brush doesn't do it for them. Do you remember the name of the "curry comb" rake thing that you are using? Is it the furminator? Thanks for any info. Debbie On Sep 29, 6:15*pm, wrote: (apologies to Dr. Seuess...) Four of the Magnificent Seven had developed nasty mats on their rear quarters. Three of them (Fearless. Smokey and Cinder) are, I think, just getting too old and stiff to groom properly, and with all the remodeling, we'd fallen down on the job of brushing our masters properly. Miss Kitty is just too darned fat to reach herself, age has nothing to do with it. We've never really had a problem of mats before this...whether because all we had were mostly DSH, or because they all groomed anyway until the went to the RB, I don't know. But a slicker brush has always sufficed to make them smooth and pretty...so far. Last week, I hit the local Petco and found 4 (four!!) kinds of de- matting tools to try. A "rake"; a thing that looks like a curry comb, which doesn't look like it ought to do anything, but it really does; a smaller andall one direction version of a rake; and this thing that looks like a women's disposable razor but isn't. (Does have sharp edges though...). We also have a pair of "bandage scissors" that we use for the worst ones. By today, Cinder's mats are all clear, and she is LOVING the curry comb treatment. Smokey's mats are all clear, and she too is loving the curry comb thing. Miss Kitty only has 3 mats left but she's gotten so distressed with me that she wo't let me near, even when I don't have anything in my hand. She hops down from where she is and stalks off when I even get near. Despite the kitty treats! (I figured food would certainly get her attention, but noooooooo....) Fearless has 2 good sized mats left, and one is much reduced because I've been picking on it by hand when he les down in the crook of my arm. He gets disgusted after a couple of minutes (at most) and gets up and talks off in a huff. Then he comes right back and lays down. I dunno about that cat.... I'm amazed at the amount of fur coming off these animals! There's plenty ot make a coat with, I'll bet... Debora Only got scracthed once. |
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The Cats and the Mats
The Doctrine of Feline Sedentation.
------------------------------------------------------- How would Christians deal with "The cat sat on the mat" if it appeared in the Bible? The Liberal theologians would point out that such a passage did not of course mean that the cat literally sat on the mat. Also cat and mat had different meanings in those days from today, and anyway, the text should he interpreted according to the customs and practices of the period. This would lead to an immediate backlash from the Evangelicals. They would make an essential condition of faith that a real, physical, living cat, being a domestic pet of the Felix Domesticus species, and having a whiskered head and furry body, four legs and a tail, did physically place its whole body on a floor covering, designed for that purpose, and which is on the floor, but not of the floor. The expression on the floor, but not of the floor would be explained in a leaflet. Meanwhile, the Catholics would have developed the Festival of the Sedentation of the Blessed Cat. This would teach that the cat was white and majestically reclined on a mat of gold thread before its assumption to the Great Cat Basket of heaven. This is commemorated by the singing of the Magnificat, lighting three candles, and ringing a bell five times. This would cause a schism with the Orthodox Church which believes that tradition requires Holy Cats Day (as it is colloquially known), to be marked by lighting six candles, and ringing the bell four times This would be partly resolved by the Cuckoo Land Declaration, recognizing the traditional validity of each. The charismatics would welcome the chance for the full experience of the feline presence. This to be shown by resting, on all four limbs, on the floor and meowing in the feline spirit. This would, naturally, only be possible following the singing, for some 30 minutes, of inspired songs such as O cat, cat, cat, come to our mat, mat, mat, Feline we enthrone you, we proclaim you as cat and When you scratch us, we know that you're here. The house church elements might even agree a common doctrine, after four pauses, in a statement of multiple clauses. Eventually, in the Church of England, the House of Bishops would issue a statement on the Doctrine of the Feline Sedentation. It would explain that traditionally the text describes a domestic feline quadruped superjacent to an unattached covering on a fundamental surface. For determining its salvific and eschatological significations, we follow the heuristic analytical principles adopted in dealing with the Canine Fenestration Question (How much is that doggie in the window?) and the Affirmative Musaceous Paradox (Yes, we have no bananas). And so on for 210 pages, The General Synod would then commend this report as helpful resource material for clergy to explain to the man in the pew the difficult doctrine of the cat sat on the mat. And the Mormons would come up with an entire rite in the Temple of the Baptism of the Dead Cat on the Mat, and would find innumerable proofs in the Book of Mormon supporting the Cat and Mat, while spending millions of dollars on archeological research to find the Mat or the Cat's bones, ultimately proving it for themselves while the rest of the archeological world scoffed. |
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The Cats and the Mats
Victor Martinez kirjoitti:
The Doctrine of Feline Sedentation. ------------------------------------------------------- How would Christians deal with "The cat sat on the mat" if it appeared in the Bible? snip of humorous doctrine description More cat humour found at http://www.badpets.net/CatHumor/CatLinks.html Where I also found this doctrine in a slightly different version. -- Christine in Laitila, Finland christal63 (at) gmail (dot) com photos: http://s208.photobucket.com/albums/bb108/christal63/ photos: http://community.webshots.com/user/chkr63 |
#6
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The Cats and the Mats
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